The Squeaky Wheels

Happy New Year!

2012-01-03T10:06:00.000-08:00

Happy New Year!

Where's Wanda the Witch?

2011-12-28T10:29:00.000-08:00

http://www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

I just noticed that a lot of people are looking for my Wanda the Witch stories that were mentioned on my blog to be on my regular website. Sadly, they have been taken off my main website to make room for a new web design. Hopefully, they'll be back. I don't know how to take off the ad for it above my blog. However, one Wanda story was posted on this site during the Wall Street debacle.Look for: Wanda the Witch Hits Wall Street on this blog (October 11, 2008). I'm so sorry for the confusion. I'll try to delete the blog but I don't know if that'll get rid of the icon at the top of my page. Augh! (I did it!)

Today, for the first time, I had a hit on this blog from Mexico. I was thrilled! A lot of my books and short stories are about my Hispanic family and I've always wanted to share those stories with readers in Mexico.

On my DVD player- Tony Bennett, Duets II. If you like Tony Bennet, you'll love this CD. All of the duets are spectacular but Lady Gaga, Amy Winehouse, k.d. Lang, and Queen Latifah are a real thrill. Of course, Mr. Bennett is amazing as always.

On my bed table- It's more like What's NOT on my bed table. About 5:30 A.M. this morning, I decided that life is too short to read Tolstoy. Vronsky, et all, you and Anna Karenina are on your own. I'm moving on!

On my TV- By accident, I ran across a show called The Art Show on HBOFW. If you have children, find it. You won't be sorry. I've got to find out when it's on because it is a jewel among swill. I haven't seen this show since the first time. It's possible it's just on HBO dvd now. Look for: Classical Baby, The Art Show.

Keith Olbermann is back on Current TV-It's hard to watch right now with all of the injustice going on in the world but we'd better watch it to keep up. The bad guys are counting on wearing us down--don't lettum'.

Out of time for today-- have a good one

http://www.JanelleMerazHooper.com/

Oh...and Bernie (Madoff)- I haven't forgotten you, you greedy destroyer of dreams and lives. What's for lunch over in the big house? I hear it's tunafish lasagna--yum-yum!

Hello, World!

2011-12-20T08:40:00.000-08:00

(The ornament that's round with lots of colors is a sand dollar that our

daughter painted when she was about eight...a long time ago!)

12-29-11 Hello! I'm getting ready for Christmas. This is the stage where the tree is still crooked, some of the lights aren't working, and my Christmas cards still aren't in the mail. But, like magic, everything will fall into place by five o'clock tonight. Merry Christmas, everyone! And Happy Hanukah to my Jewish friends. I missed Ramadan completely this year but will make it up to you next year. Where did August go?

Before I get back to the Christmas tree I want to stop and welcome all of my readers from Germany, the UK, France, Italy, Russia, Spain, and other countries too numerous to list. I laughed the other day when the stats showed I had one reader in Canada. ONE! Ha! I try to write very clearly so that I'm easily understood. If you are having any problems with this blog or any of my books, please let me know. Sometimes a word will pop up in the news that I think is funny so I'll use it. Sometimes, it isn't even a real word but something another writer has made up. I'll try to be better about that.

Before we know it, we'll have a new year. May we all find peace and justice.

Children's Christmas Story!

2011-12-07T12:51:00.000-08:00

Note: Clip art from Microsoft--thanks, Bill!

Ribbons at Christmas

Janelle Meraz Hooper

This is a story about a cat. A house cat. He belonged to a little girl named Hannah. She had named her cat Ribbons because, when he was a kitten, he loved to play with the gift ribbons that were kept in a box under the stairs in the pantry.
Ribbons was a very good cat eleven months out of the year, but the twelfth month was almost his undoing.
It was Christmas! The month of holly, silver bells, and CHRISTMAS TREES! It wasn't just the tree itself that got Ribbons into trouble. Oh, no, the tree in his house was dressed in twinkling lights, shiny Christmas Balls, and long silver icicles that hung almost to the floor.
None of these beautiful things, of course, were meant for Ribbon's entertainment, but no one thought to tell him!
As soon as the last ornament, the golden star, was placed on top of the Christmas tree, and all of the lights began to blink, Ribbons went into action.
His first leap was from the floor to the sofa. Then from the sofa to the middle of the tree. He
was well on his way to the top when he felt the tree begin to tumble. The next thing he knew, he was on the floor, and the tree was on top of him! Lights, icicles, and Christmas balls were scattered all over.
Dad was shouting, Mom was yelling, Hannah was crying, and Gramma and Grandpa were laughing. What a lot of racket!
Ribbons was so frightened and embarrassed that he ran for the basement. He hid in the very back of the pantry, under the stairs. He was very frightened and fully intended to stay hidden until there wasn't a scent of pine left in the house!
Meanwhile, upstairs, the family had rearranged the tree and it looked as good as ever. Everyone was very sad, knowing Ribbons must be so miserable in the pantry. Finally, even father admitted he missed Ribbons. He went to the top of the stairs and called down, "Ribbons, I'm sorry I threatened to make you live in the barn. Please come upstairs and spend Christmas with us!" But Ribbons wouldn't come upstairs.
Next, Mom went to the head of the stairs and called down, "Ribbons, I'm sorry I called you clumsy—please come upstairs!"
Gramma didn't bother to say anything. She just went to the kitchen and made much ado about pouring dry cat food (Ribbon's favorite) into his bowl. Before she put the food away, she shook the box a few times in the direction of the stairs. Ribbons had to have heard that! But still he didn't come.
Grampa took the strong approach, "Ribbons," he commanded, "get up here!" But that didn't work at all. Ribbons just shrank back further into the pantry.
The house became very quiet. If things didn't improve, it was going to be a very sad Christmas!
There was only one person left who hadn't spoken to Ribbons and asked him to come back upstairs—Hannah. Now, Hannah was very small but somehow she knew what to do. She went to the tree and took off the shiniest red satin ball. Then she very carefully backed down the stairs on her hands and knees, holding the shiny red ball close to her heart. Quietly, she made her way to the very back of the pantry, and sat down next to Ribbons. She gave him a big hug and pulled him onto her lap. Next, she placed the shiny red ball between his paws.
Before long, the rest of the family could hear a very playful Ribbons and a very clever Hannah playing on the stairs with the shiny red satin Christmas ball. Soon, they would be all the way upstairs.

Gramma went to the kitchen for milk and cookies for everyone...it was going to be a very Merry Christmas, after all!

The end

Merry Christmas!

On Facebook? Please click share on bottom. Thanks.

How to cook a turkey--if you're a reader

2011-11-22T11:00:00.000-08:00

Are you cooking this week? Here's a tip: buy the biggest frozen turkey you can find. Put it in the oven now. That should give you plenty of time to read my books on Kindle and Nook before you have to serve dinner on Thursday!

The story below was originally from Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories. I'm posting it here because it's about my family. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

A New-fangled Thanksgiving Tradition

Janelle Meraz Hooper

   Thanksgiving dinner was always the same at Mom’s, and that was how we liked it. In a changing world that created new stress by the minute, we could always depend on Mom’s turkey to be perfectly browned, and her cornbread dressing nicely laced with celery, wild pecans, and raisins. Giblet gravy, mashed potatoes, sweet potatoes, and peas filled in every spare spot on our plate. There were no tortillas on this day—I suspect because there just wasn’t enough free counter space in the kitchen to roll them out. The rolls we ate were the packaged kind that came in a paper tray and were already partially cooked. The cranberry sauce that replaced the normal salsa was canned and always served on our fancy glass tray that had been around since Roosevelt put a turkey in every pot (or was that a chicken?).
   Okay, so it wasn’t a gourmet meal, but it was good—and the large family that came to share it thought it was perfect. Almost every time.
   But one year, when my mom and her sister were both close to eighty, my aunt arrived from California and brought her new-fangled ideas about tradition with her. Thanksgiving morning, my Aunt Pat got up early and beat my mom to the kitchen, determined to “California-ize” our turkey dinner. The first item on the menu that she changed was the cranberries―she used real ones. Mom was suspicious when she looked at the marble-sized fruit bubbling on the stove with bits of fresh orange peel. She didn’t like the looks of those orange shavings. To her, they looked like something that slipped past the food inspectors. Mom believed cranberry sauce should be pushed out of a can with those little ridges that showed her where to cut the slices. “No one will know what this stuff is.” she worried. “This isn’t what they’re used to. And it smells funny.”
   My aunt stood her ground. Resigned to a cranberry failure, Mom went to the living room to relax and read the paper. She didn’t see my aunt pull my mom’s traditional cornbread dressing out of the oven and stir in a bag of fresh spinach. The last thing my aunt did before she left the kitchen was replace the table butter with an unidentified soy product she’d brought in her handbag from Santa Barbara that didn’t look, taste, or smell like butter.
   The family was sitting down at the table when Mom pulled the dressing out of the oven and discovered that it’d turned green. Her sister told her it was the latest thing in California, and much healthier. Mom was appalled and predicted, “No one will eat it.”
   And they didn’t. That bowl was passed around the table so often it looked like it was in its own special green orbit, and no one would touch it. On one of its last flights around the table, my cousin reluctantly put a spoonful on her toddler’s plate, but the kid broke out in tears, so my cousin took it off and hid it in her napkin. Finally, my aunt mumbled something about taking the dressing to the kitchen to heat it up. It never returned.
   The fancy cranberry sauce met much the same fate. When it was passed around the table, everyone would try to get a portion that was not laced with orange peel. No one succeeded. Soon it entered its own orbit, crisscrossing the orbit of the green cornbread dressing. Around and around the table it flew until the contents of the bowl were just a fragrant red blur circling the Planet Table, not unlike the rings around Saturn.
   Mom and her sister are both gone now, and I think of them often, especially around the holidays. Looking back, maybe green dressing and orange cranberries wouldn’t have been that awful. I should have at least tasted them. Although, sister rivalry being what it was, I’m sure Mom would have never forgiven me if I had.
   It has been years since that dinner, but the saga of the New-Fangled Thanksgiving Tradition lives on to this day. No one in our family will accept an invitation for Thanksgiving dinner without first inquiring, “What’s in your cranberries—and what color is your cornbread dressing?”

King George's Sleepover, World War II

2011-11-20T09:40:00.000-08:00

All Kindle and Nook novels $2.99 USD

The King’s Speech is one of my favorite movies and it’s on TV sometimes now. Even though I saw it in the theater, I usually stop and watch it for a while whenever it’s on.
I like the film for lots of reasons, but the biggest is the character of the speech therapist played by Lionel Logue. A normal person. Not royal-born. Not a doctor. Nonetheless, this unassuming person is able to provide a great service to King George and to England. I like that. And the king and his wife stood by him. I like that too.
This week, so soon after our Veteran’s Day, something in the movie triggered a memory of a story my father used to tell. I think it’s true, even though I have to admit my father was a great storyteller. He used to say that, in World War II, when the American soldiers landed in England, they had them set up camp on the grounds around Windsor Castle.
One evening, my father remembered, King George and his daughter, the future Queen Elizabeth, walked around the encampment, shook hands with the soldiers, and thanked them for coming. Imagine! Cowboys from Texas, loggers from the Northwest, stevedores from New Jersey, maybe even Indians from The Great Plains—all shook hands with the king!
Oh, I hope the story was true. If so, King George—and his daughter—had a lot of class. And that’s not something that comes automatically with a crown.

Raven meets Quidditch!

2011-11-10T11:32:00.000-08:00

My raven

11-10-11- I like to make little vignettes of books or stories in my house using whatever I find in the closets. This one is a reference to a Native American story about how the raven stole the earth...only I used a Quidditch ball for the earth (okay, it's really just a Quidditch Christmas ornament). Perhaps the funniest thing is that the family never comments! This little story has been up for over a week now...no one has noticed!

I miss my Aunt Norah. She was playful too. One time we had the key to a relative's house so we could feed her cats when she was away. We "broke in" and left a full-size cardboard cutout of Billy Ray Cyrus (Achy, Breaky Heart) in her kitchen. Along with balloons and a sexy note.

In my novels she's always out of town but I write about her a lot. I guess my Turtle Trilogy novels are really fictional autobiographies. Who knew? At the time, I was just trying to get the books written before I lost all of my favorite aunts and my mother. I didn't make it. Not one of them lived long enough to read my valentines to them.

New, low Kindle and Nook prices

2011-11-08T10:49:00.000-08:00

New, low Kindle and Nook price: $2.99 USD

11-08-11- There's been a lot of discussion among writers who are making their paperback and hardcover books available on electronic devices. What's the right price? What's a fair price? No one knows. In the end, independent writers will make their own decisions. I have made mine: I have lowered the prices of my Kindle and Nook books to $2.99 USD.

Not because there is anything wrong with them (an award winner is still an award winner even if the price changes). And it's not because some of them are old. If you haven't read a book yet, it's still new to you.

Mostly, it's about copyright. I happen to own my works, and there are no "middlemen" for me to pay.

I hope you'll check out my books. They're good reads. I promise.

Other news:

My Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories book of shorts and short stories and As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries are now a part of Amazon's WorldReader program. I'm delighted to participate in this program to bring books to needy children in underdeveloped countries. I'm hoping other authors will join this program. It's easy. Amazon does all the work!

In October, when I put my As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries book on sale (the sale is over now) for $.99 cents USD, I was just fooling around. I was sick. And bored. What fun! I got messages from relatives and friends who read the book and remembered some of the events. I never expected this to happen. Thank you all!

As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries

2011-10-06T11:20:00.000-07:00

Back cover...

The summer of 1952, Lawton, Oklahoma… Eight-year-old Glory has a father who’s taken out a $50,000 accidental death insurance policy on her—now he’s spending the summer trying to collect.

In his first attempt, he throws Glory to the snakes, but a giant alligator snapping turtle scares the snakes away.

Glory writes in her diary: Well, Powwow Pete drove us home to talk to Mom, but we didn’t get very far. Mom thinks I just have a wild imagination. At least Powwow Pete believes me. I think it was the turtle that killed it for Mom

“How could there be a turtle that big?” she scoffed. They talked some more and Powwow Pete got kind of mad and got up to leave.

This was one of those times when a kid thinks they’re talking about a turtle, but the grown-ups are really talking about something else entirely. In this case, I think Powwow Pete was accusing Mom of still loving my dad, but he never said that, he just kept talking about the turtle. Mom was doing the same thing: talking about the turtle but meaning that she didn’t want to get messed up with some guy who was a pathologgy liar (Glory can’t spell).

1999 1st place fiction, Surrey (Canada)

2004 Oklahoma Book Award finalist

Remembering 9-11

2011-09-07T11:32:00.000-07:00

Two Windows on Ground Zero (reprint)

Janelle Meraz Hooper

   September 11th found me stuck at home alone with only a 38-inch screen TV, and a large living room window.
   I could have done without the big screen TV. This was one time a one-inch screen would have been too big—too painful to watch. Over and over and over I watched the planes hit the WTC towers in New York City.
   A feeling of being trapped overcame me as I looked out the living room window. No sign of the tragedy was visible in the surrounding homes. Not a person was in sight. Maybe it was a nightmare—but no—there it was on CNN. On ABC. On CBS. On Fox. On CBUT, the Canadian channel. I turned to Univision, the Spanish-speaking channel, and saw a blazing banner: Bajo (Low) Attack!
   I must have paced between the TV and the window thirty or forty times. Looking at the TV, looking out the window. Still no sign of life in my neighborhood. Where could everybody be? At the time, I couldn’t leave my home, but they were all fully mobile. I can’t explain the intense need I felt to see a human—especially an American human.
   Suddenly, A little dark blue import, driven by an elderly gentleman, raced up my neighbor’s long driveway. Attached to the back window of the car was an American flag. A message was painted against the dark glass in white paint: GOD BLESS AMERICA!
   While I was waiting for him to come by again, I heard cars honking down the hill. Soon, a car full of hollering teenagers flew by my house. The car was painted all over with patriotic messages, and a young man was fully reclined on the hood holding up an American flag. He was wearing a shirt with an all-over pattern in red, white, and blue stars and stripes. Suddenly, I felt connected.
   Dragging my bandaged body along with me, I hastened downstairs to get our flag. When I got to our front porch, I was disappointed to discover that my husband had removed the flag holder from the front of the house. Or had it just rusted off? Anxious to communicate with passersby, I stuck the flag in a huge flowerpot by my front door and went back to my television and my window. The window was a lot easier to watch.

Radio for writers!

2011-09-02T09:49:00.000-07:00

Listen to Gerry Bradley each Saturday on KLAY-1180 A M Talk Radio, 8:45-9:00 A. M., on September 3, 2011- Gerry reads from Nancy Atchley's book, The Legends Remain.

Turtle Trilogy on sale!

2011-08-25T08:48:00.000-07:00

It's still summer as long as you have a good book!

Hello! I've lowered the prices on my award-winning Turtle Trilogy books on Kindle. They're still good reads, it's just that I've been around so long I'm gaining more control over my inventory. Give them a look!

(Reviews and comments)

A Three-Turtle Summer

Janelle Meraz Hooper

A Cool Book Review (www.cool-book-review.com )

Janelle Hooper has brought a story of domestic violence into fine focus with this book. It is a tragic tale but one reflecting the persistence of the human spirit which eventually brings a final relief from the agonies of pain, fear, and violence. The demeaning treatment of the heroine of this tale by her husband and her resourcefulness to secretly battle him could only be told by someone who has been very close to similar actual events as either participant or observer. Kindle, $5.99 USD (Also in paperback)

As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries

Janelle Meraz Hooper

Janelle Meraz Hooper has hit a homerun with her second book, AS BROWN AS I WANT, The Indianhead Diaries." Even better than her much acclaimed first book, A THREE-TURTLE SUMMER, Janelle's new book propels the reader through a series of unique situations as experienced by eight-year-old Glory, who always seems just a few steps ahead of her scheming father. Kindle $3.99 USD (Also in paperback) Kelly Creso, Bold Media Corporation

Custer and His Naked Ladies

Janelle Meraz Hooper

Janelle Meraz Hooper has done it again! Custer and His Naked Ladies is filled with quirky and likable characters in a richly detailed setting. Humor, family and love come shining through. There is a poignant line in the book that has stayed with me: "Old age had crept in and stolen their bodies while they were dancing through life." These women have danced! VF Gibson, Seattle, WA Kindle $5.99 USD (Also in paperback)

Read free sample chapters here:

Boogie, Boots & Cherry Pie

2011-08-16T11:29:00.000-07:00

Summer isn't over as long as you have a good book!

8-16-11- My new light romance is now available on Kindle, Nook, and others. Read the first chapter for free on my website above.

Boogie, Boots & Cherry Pie

Janelle Meraz Hooper

When the great guy that Lily meets at her company’s St. Patrick’s Day party takes her home he discovers she lives at the Zoo, an apartment building that caters to tenants who have exotic pets. Unfortunately, one of the animals is missing and when Mike drops her off the first thing he sees is a sign on the front door:

Please Don’t Let Out The Snake!

While Lily is trying to figure out how Boogie, a big boa constrictor, is getting into her room, Mike, her new boyfriend, has his own problems. He’s a jewelry designer who is in danger of defaulting on a contract because all of his workers live on a flood plain and the river is rising. When it finally floods, everyone, including their pets, disappears without a trace. Suddenly, Mike isn’t worried about his business anymore. He’s worried about his workers and their families. Are they okay? Where could they be?
Filled with lively characters including: a Jamaican landlady, Reggae, whose traditional headdress holds her phone, iPod, and assorted office supplies; her boyfriend Mingo who thinks he doesn’t fit in; and Velma, a tenant who collects snakes—big ones. Tension rises when Reggae and Lily begin to fear that Boogie is stalking Boots, Reggae’s pet iguana.

Janelle Meraz Hooper is an award-winning writer originally from Oklahoma who now lives in Washington State. Contact her at: http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/ or email: JanelleMHooper@comcast.net

Other books I've written:

A Three-Turtle Summer

As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries

Custer and His Naked Ladies

Bears in the Hibiscus

Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories

Read free samples of all on my website:

Seattle PI interview

2011-08-11T10:34:00.000-07:00

8-11-11- Hi! I've just had an interview posted on the Seattle PI online newspaper. I don't know how long it'll be up... http://www.seattlepi.com/lifestyle/blogcritics/article/Interview-with-Janelle-Meraz-Hooper-Author-of-1748069.php

Boogie, Boots & Cherry Pie is now available on Kindle, Nook, and others.

Tomorrow (Saturday, August 12th) on Chit-Chat Cafe, Gerry Bradley will read from Dana Quaid's new book, Doing The Thing. Be sure to listen in on KLAY-1180 A. M. Talk Radio, 8:45-9:00 A. M.

Soon, I'll be posting the first chapter of Boogie, Boots & Cherry Pie on my website: http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

Gotta go! It's been a busy morning.

Ahlam's Stories, stories of Iraq

2011-07-01T12:48:00.000-07:00

Ahlam's Stories as told to Val Dumond

What are you reading?- Let me know!

Politics-I’m so sick of politicians. Where are our statesmen?
On my TV-Chris Matthews (MSNBC)- I really like this guy. If only he wouldn’t let everyone talk at once. The Turner Movie Channel-Ted Turner has restored some new films that I’ll be watching for. I have forgotten the titles but will let you know when I see them. Mariner’s Baseball-if you have enough popcorn losing doesn’t hurt so much.
On my Kindle-Private Arrangements by Sherri Thomas. I loved this historical romance.
On my bed table- Ahlam’s Stories as told to Val Dumond, Muddy Puddle Press, Kindle, $3.99 USD

Synopsis, Ahlam's Stories

Stories of life in Iraq as you haven’t seen it.

--Love, marriage, children, work and play.
Pleasures and tragedies, hope and…life—
as told through the eyes of a woman who dearly wants
the West to know the real Iraq and its people
the way it was before…
--before her country was muddled with the boots
of invaders,
…before her lovely home was blown to pieces,
…before her family was maimed, killed, or sent
into despair,
…before she became so ill she has to flee, or die on troubled soil.

Bernie Madoff- What’s for lunch over in the big house, Bernie?

Quote du jour: “The practice of putting women on pedestals began to die out when it was discovered that they could give orders better from there.” Betty Grable

Janelle Meraz Hooper is a women's fiction writer who has a lot of friends involved in the magical process of writing books. She joyfully shares them with you.

Read free samples of my books on www.Amazon.com

For more information visit my website

http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

Boogie, Boots & Cherry Pie, oh my!

2011-06-09T08:08:00.000-07:00

To be released soon on Kindle

What’s up?- You may have been wondering where I’ve been. I’ve been doing a lot of research for a project that will become a one-man show. More on that later. I’ve missed you all!
The cover above is for my new romance. I plan to put it on Kindle soon. Someday. When the tomatoes get ripe (I live in a rain forest!). I don’t know why I have such a hard time releasing my books. I don’t want to let them go.
Boogie, Boots & Cherry Pie is a very light romance:
When Lily moves into the renovated building that has been converted into apartments, she discovers almost every tenant has an exotic animal for a pet, and what she has really done is move onto the third floor of a zoo. Unfortunately, some of the animals aren’t under control, and when she meets a great guy who drops her off at her apartment after her company’s St. Patrick’s Day party, the first thing he sees is a sign on the door: Please Don’t Let Out The Snake! Is this the beginning of a great romance or just the beginning of a great snake hunt?
Politics- I’ve been busy so I haven’t kept up with Bernie Madoff, our country’s great swindler. How ya doin’ over there in the big house, Bernie? What’s for lunch?
Nothing explains the Republican Party better than Donald Trump going out to lunch with Sara Palin at a pizza restaurant whose franchise orignated in Poland. I may be wrong about Poland...but Jon Stewart says it was the worst choice for a pizza lunch in a city known for its pizza restaurants...
On my TV-
Anthony Bourdain, No Reservations. I love the film of faraway locations and his interaction with the people there.
The Turner Channel- Love the old black and white movies.
Joan Rivers, A Piece of Work- What a talent she is. This backstage peek at her life is an eye opener.
On my radio- Gerry Bradley, Chit Chat, KLAY-1180 A. M. talk radio, 8:45-9:00 A. M. If you’re in the Tacoma area, give a listen.
On my bed table-
Lots of research books on the American West- I have loved every minute of it. It is my new definition of a briar patch.
Do the Work, Steven Pressfield- I am hooked on self-help books, but this was a silly choice. The last thing I need is motivation to work. But get it. Read it on the beach. Confuse the masses.
Elements of Inclusive Language, Val Dumond-Val is a great resource. Check out her new blog The Anarchists Guide to Grammar http://grammaranarchist.blogspot.com/
The Help, Kathryn Stockett- Loved it!

Quote: “The best way to have a good idea is to have lots of ideas.” Linus Pauling

Read sample chapters of my books:

http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

Kindle book--Sometimes, Custer is just an old yeller dog...

2011-05-23T11:51:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, Custer is just an old yeller dog...

and Naked Ladies are fully clothed!

The third book in the Turtle Trilogy...

Custer and His Naked Ladies
Kindle and paperback

Janelle Meraz Hooper

When her husband unexpectedly dumps her, Glory boards an Oklahoma-bound plane at the Sea-Tac Airport. On her way to the ticket counter, she takes the framed photo of her husband out of her gym bag and dumps it into the nearest trash bin—frame and all. She has wasted too many years on a man who doesn’t want her, and her biological clock is beginning to pound like a powwow drum.

Part Hispanic, part Anglo, and raised on the reservation, Glory hopes that by going back to her roots she’ll discover who she is, but she finds her home is in turmoil. Her greedy stepmother has returned, a group of dysfunctional mobsters wants her mother’s land on the Indian reservation to build a casino, her pastor cousin is kidnapped in Mexico while on a mission, and Glory’s beloved turtles are in an environmental crisis.

Her biggest problem of all may be Soap, a sexy Comanche lawyer who wants to do something about that powwow drum pounding in her head…

Sprinkled with Spanish phrases and Comanche words, Custer and His Naked Ladies is full of Southwest flavor. iUniverse, 206 pages, Paperback$15.95, Kindle $7.00.

Paperback and Kindle

Available on Amazon.com and other Internet book sites

Hi, everyone! I'll be back soon! I miss you all!

Kindle short story book on sale! Teacher favorite!

2011-05-17T20:03:00.000-07:00

Kindle version now $2.99 USD

What’s a chick story? To me, it’s a story with no drugs, bombs, or spies who have numbers instead of names. And clean. It’s gotta be clean. Spend some time with Free Pecan Pie, and its other stories and shorts like Elvis Has Left the Building…and is Living in My Computer, Are the Snacks Here Yet?, Wanda the Witless Witch of Boo, The New Anything-But-Turkey Diet, My Christmas List, and more and have a smile on me.

I balanced out the short stories with some commentaries so we won’t forget where we’ve been…and how far we have to go.
If you’re looking for the answer to world peace, you probably won’t find it here, but why does everything have to be so serious? Get out, have some fun, and take Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories along with you! A good book for those practising their English.

Note: This book has the Bridge to Divorce story that was so popular it was pirated and posted all over the Internet.

iUniverse, Paperback,132 pages, $12.95 USD. Kindle, 253 kb, $2.99 USD.

Other books by Janelle Meraz Hooper

A Three-Turtle Summer

As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries

Custer and His Naked Ladies

Coming in 2011: Boogie, Boots & Cherry Pie

Bears in the Hibiscus, Kindle verson, on sale!

2011-05-15T09:21:00.000-07:00

This is what happens when you give a writer a Flip for Easter!

I've just lowered the price on my Kindle book, Bears in the Hibiscus.

...Mary thinks the last person she wants to see on her Hawaiian vacation is her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana Park Ranger...

Birds in the Thicket

2011-04-18T13:55:00.000-07:00

My friend, fellow author and fellow Okie has a wonderful recall of his childhood and when his problems started.

Birds in the Thicket Gerry Bradley

We stood and peered out on the view at Pier 91, where the Naval Base was and out on Elliott Bay, taking in all of the traffic of the ferryboats and the shipping lanes, with the incoming freighters to track the arrival of Jesse’s vessels.
I know as I write, it wasn’t the entities, the time, or the place that was of essence. It’s the patterning of all personages as they either did fit, or misfit within my life through those years, which came to be as vast as the leaves blossoming and falling. It had nothing to do with their size, looks, or points on the leaf itself. What was prominent was the placement and behaviorally how my deeds either attracted or pushed away any opportunities of gaining any form of a balanced way to continue.

At this time in our lives all of us were experiencing, even trying on for size, those who we came to meet and began to know. This didn’t occur only with those we attended school with, but rather all we contacted throughout our lives. No matter what school activities we attended, such as PTA or the All City Affairs, we met new people and had moments of thoroughly enjoying the music as we practiced our steps across the floors.

Due to our membership, as members of the Seattle Chapter of Demolay we met the Jobs-daughters at Saturday evening dances.
I realized long ago that all of it was like a natural turn of events. There was an exception for many of us; that was how all of these events were far too much to adapt to, such as when the music took a swing toward the Bop and the Stroll I found as perhaps others did, my feet just wouldn’t move to the beat where some seemed to flow with no problem or effort whatsoever.

I came to love and respect our home and where it was located to the point I would bound up those flights of stairs from Tenth avenue West, eastbound toward Queen Anne Avenue, to the base of the final set of stairs which took me within blocks of being at school on time. This was the best feeling in the whole world!
I can see how you are sitting with anticipation as the seasons are taking their natural change. You can sense there is soon to be another shift in the clouds, the mood, that was always effected by the current carrying those damnable ships, that carried much more than the trade, rather, the sense of rhythm of our lives, within our families’ mood and ability to treat such trade winds about to hit us again as a family. AuthorHouse, $15.99

For an autographed copy, contact Gerry: gkbwriter@nventure.com

http://www.amazon.com/ and others...

Quote: "Anyone who says they have only one life to live must not know how to read a book." Unknown, courtesy of A Novel Idea Bookstore, Puyallup

Doing The Thing!

2011-03-02T14:56:00.000-08:00

What’s new? A Northwest author has a book out that I thought you’d enjoy taking a peek at…

This time…fall in love with yourself! Doing The Thing Dana Quade

Have you ever been caught in water so strong that it has you in its grip? In the process of living, sometimes we feel trapped or even like we are going under. When this occurs, the tendency is to panic and struggle. The word and picture that comes to mind when this happens to me is riptide. The correct term for this phenomenon in nature is rip current. Riptide is used here because it may be more familiar. Using the image of a coastal riptide has helped me go from stuck and struggling to back in the flow.

When we are in a riptide situation, we are inclined to fight it. To save ourselves, we need to do the opposite: relax and surrender to it. Expert advice for surviving a rip current says: don’t fight it, float, (which requires relaxing,) and ask for help if necessary. This may be hard to believe in times of trouble, but we are always in the flow of never-ending well-being. Our resistance to it keeps us from feeling it. This is the main reason for our pain--all of it: physical, emotional and spiritual.

“…engaging, inspirational, provocative and best of all, useful…”

Doing The Thing Do The Thing Publishing, LLC, $16.00 Dana Quade

autographed copies: www.doingthething.com

www.Amazon.com

Book for Valentine's Day!

2011-02-10T08:24:00.000-08:00

Pick up some for your friends!

Back cover…

Mary thinks the last person she wants to see on her Hawaiian vacation is her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana Park Ranger…

Mary Bergstrom, a single mom, has left her twenty-five year marriage and entered the work force for the first time.

Luckily, she has found a job she loves and two good friends who are also starting their lives over. Despite challenges, they haven’t lost their positive, humorous outlook. Mary has a plan to make a success of her new life that includes fiscal stability and excludes men. Not that she has anything against them, she just thinks she can’t afford them. Unlike Mary, her friend, Roxanne, is launching a detailed plan to find a Captain Marvelous with a yacht. Ray, another friend, bounces from coffee baristas to business moguls looking for love that’s lasting and real.

Mary’s plans aren’t that grand. All she wants is a Hawaiian vacation so she can relax. Too late, she discovers her ex-brother-in-law, Mark, a park ranger from Montana, will be there at the same time for a conference on state parks. He leaves a note for her at the hotel desk warning her to watch out for bears. He hasn’t seen any, but he thinks there might be Bears in the Hibiscus.

Available on http://www.amazon.com/ and other online bookstores, $9.99

Read sample chapters:

Happy New Year!

2011-01-06T10:36:00.000-08:00

01-05-11- Last year, I was alone a lot because my husband was very busy. I decided that I had enough time to write two books at once. Even though they are well on their way to being finished, I'm holding them back for a while for a final tweaking. My editor hates it when I rewrite after she has already edited...please don't tell her!

Politics: An open comment to our congress: this year, I want more. More integrity. More cooperation. More statesmanship. More good government. See what you can do.

I almost forgot: Hey, Bernie! What's for lunch over in the big house?!

On my TV: I haven't had time to check out the new shows. I hope there is something for me this season. If it weren't for Discovery, The History Channel, The Food Network, HGTV, and MSNBC, I'd sell my TV and buy a radio. What are you watching? Write and let me know.

Quote: "Learn to be happy with what you have while you pursue all that you want." courtesy of Cyndee Shingledecker.

Read a sample chapter of my latest romance, Bears in the Hibiscus and other good reads here:

Grandmother's Screen Door

2011-01-05T08:37:00.000-08:00

January 5, 2011- Just before Christmas, I was asked to submit a multi-cultural commentary on Collaborative Nation: http://www.collaborativenation.com/bicultural-and-mutlicultural-corner.html

I was pleased to participate in this project as my family was definitely multi-cultural! Our family was a happy mix of Hispanics, Anglos, Germans, and Japanese! I guess that's what you can expect when a lot of the men in the family were in the military.

Right now, there are three commentaries, more are on the way.

Quote:"I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally." - WC Fields.

See my books :

http://www.amazon.com/

and other Internet sites

Say what, Robson?

2010-12-16T10:04:00.000-08:00

The cover isn't finished yet...this is just an ad

Mary thought the last person she wanted to see on her Hawaiian vacation

was her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana Park Ranger...

Facebook?- If you could only see me struggling with the simplest of computer tasks, Robson, you'd laugh. Interface with Facebook? Oh, my. I did look around Google, hoping for a little button I could just push, but no luck. I appreciate your input. Thanks for writing. Facebook button, huh? Hmmmmm...I'll look around some more...

Boogie, Boots, & Cherry Pie- I had an email asking why I delayed my newest romance to do a piece for a multi-cultural website. It was a tough call; I'm normally very methodic about my work habits. The answer is that the multi-cultural thing was a collaborative effort, and I didn't want to keep other writers waiting for me to finish my piece of the project.

Quote du jour: "Trouble rides a fast horse." Jimmy Stewart in The Cheyenne Social Club

See all of my books and read sample chapters here:

purchase my books on:

Amazon.com

Merry Christmas!

2010-12-13T12:57:00.000-08:00

2010 Christmas card

"Mary thinks the last person she wants to see on her Hawaiian vacation is her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana Park Ranger..."

What’s up?
I’ve been working on a lot of projects. I coordinated and participated in a holiday book event for our Northwest Authors in November. It was a huge success and I consider it the first Christmas party of the season for me. There’s more info on my webpage: http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

2010 Oklahoma Book Awards- Even though the book I wrote this year isn’t based in Oklahoma, I entered the contest anyway so they won’t forget me! Bears in the Hibiscus is a humorous romance that should give the judges some giggles even if it isn’t chosen to be a finalist.

I’ve just completed a collaboration with other writers for a multi-cultural website: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/pages/Bicultural-and-Multicultural-People-Rule-A-Place-to-Discuss-Our-Uniquenes/103633399674730 , I’ll let you know when it is posted.

I did my Christmas card for 2010. I’ve posted it above.

Mentored several authors on how to get their books on Kindle.

Boogie, Boots, and Cherry Pie is back from the editor and is ready for final tweaking.

I hope you all have a Merry Christmas! A belated Happy Hanukah to my Jewish friends (time got away from me this year).

In the new year, I’ll be posting some sample chapters from other Northwest authors. Please check back!

Now, I’d better get out the catalogs and do some Christmas shopping. Where does the time go?

Quote du jour: "Knowledge is a rising tide that floats all boats." Courtesy of Mike Meraz (not a relation of mine...I say that to protect him!)

http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/
No time to edit! Send complaints to my email address: JanelleMHooper@comcast.net

Vote Patty Murray!

2010-10-29T09:58:00.000-07:00

Vote for Patty Murray!

Photo courtesy of Sierra Club. Alright, I swiped it from them.

What are they going to do about it, feed me to the whales?

10-29-10- Patty has done a good job for the people of Washigton and our country. Whether or not you are in agreement with our political process, power in the U. S. Senate stems from seniority. In Patty, we have a 3-term senator who has proven her ability to function as a U. S. Senator and is a powerful voice for the State of Washington. In these economic times, replacing her with a junior senator with no voice and no position of power is not smart politics. Her opponent, Mr. Rossi, has run for governor twice. Now he is running for the U. S. Senate. The Washington electorate has twice made the correct decision and should, once again, reject Mr. Rossi's attempt to feed at the public trough he so vehemently opposes. Dino Rossi: Not ready for prime time!

Vote, Washington! Rock the vote!

Price break on Kindle Bears in the Hibiscus!

2010-09-01T16:06:00.000-07:00

New Kindle price: $4.99 USD

paperback, $9.99 USD

Mary thinks the last person she wants to see on her Hawaiian vacation is her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana Park Ranger...

There's still some sun left...order this book and run for the beach!

http://www.elfihornby.com/

Note: All of my books are formatted for Kindle and paperback. Not all of my guest authors have their books in a format for Kindle, and are only available in paperback.

Snakes, and lizards, and cherry pie, oh my!

2010-08-22T09:52:00.000-07:00

Why did that hunky guy grin when Lily ordered a piece of cherry Pie?

A new, humorous romance by Janelle Meraz Hooper

Guest author, Elfi Hornby

2010-07-10T14:52:00.000-07:00

Dancing to War © 1997 Elfi Hornby
non-fiction, 296 pages, $16.95

From time to time, I like to feature books by Northwest authors other than myself. My guest for July is Elfi Hornby. I hope you'll enjoy this excerpt:

In victory or defeat, war is about death, suffering and destruction.
It is the taker of youth, the taker of dreams.

I

Drafted

An eerie, dead darkness shrouded the city of Poznan, Poland on that early January morning in 1943. The unlit streets remained deserted. The blacked-out buildings gave no hint of life within. Only occasional gusts of wind, whooshing around corners, rattling a loose shutter or door, broke the dark, ghostly silence and momentarily cleared the air of soot and smoke. It seemed as if Poznan and all that dwelled within it had fallen into a coma or under some evil spell.
My colleagues and I sat shivering on our trunks and suitcases in the back of a canvas-topped truck, waiting for the driver to take us to the railway station. Cold and miserable inside and out, our usually animated group had slipped into brooding silence. Suddenly sucked into the eye of a vicious storm, a bloody, merciless war, we pondered our helpless, hopeless situation and our chances of survival.
There were eleven of us: eight girls, dancers, between the ages of sixteen and twenty-one; Hannimusch, a matronly singer and our accompanist; Egon Molkow, our director, ballet-and-taskmaster; and his wife, Hilde, mother hen and go-between. I was sixteen, the youngest in the group.
Our small, traveling dance company had recently left Berlin to begin a new tour through eastern Germany. Relieved to escape the nightly bombing raids on the city, we grudgingly accepted the tedium of wartime travel, from late and overcrowded trains and broken-down buses, to unheated hotels and theaters. At least, we were no longer in the line of fire.
We had spent less than two weeks on the road when our troupe received a summons to appear and audition before the German Military High Command in Poznan, Poland. It superceded all prior commitments and put us on the next train to Poznan. We knew that the military on occasion drafted shows for the sole purpose of entertaining its troops, and speculated with some excitement that we might be sent to France, Belgium, or to some other safe zone.
In a whirlwind of events, within only three days after arriving in Poznan, we had auditioned, were approved and processed like draftees, were given a number and handed our orders—a six-month assignment to the Russian front.
The Russian front!!! Our first reaction was, “No! This can’t be happening! Not to us! They would not…they could not send us girls, adolescents to the front, into the bloodiest of all battle zones! To Russia…in the deep of winter? No! We aren’t soldiers, we are dancers.”
The Russian Front!!! Orders every soldier feared. Orders often given out as punishment. Too many of our men who had been sent there never returned. The lucky ones got wounded. It was like a death sentence.
Also, the timing could not have been worse. The German army had just suffered its biggest, bloodiest defeat of the entire war at Stalingrad, which left it crippled and its front lines virtually defenseless. Our soldiers complained bitterly about shortages, from winter clothing, to supplies, to ammunition and equipment. Now they faced a stronger-than-ever Russian army, preparing to launch a new major offensive and had nothing left to stop it. Morale among them had plummeted to its lowest point.
What could they want with girls at a time like this?
Our orders listed Smolensk as our immediate destination. On a map at headquarters, it showed Smolensk to be only twenty some miles behind the lines, protruding into enemy territory like a burr. A severe winter freeze had temporarily stalled the fighting there, but once the weather eased, we would be caught in the thick of it. We felt like sacrificial lambs sent to appease the God of war.
During the short, bumpy ride through the narrow, cobbled streets of Poznan to the railway station, my mind raced down a road of gloomy scenarios. Six months from now, where would I be? Dead? Wounded? Or even worse—captured by the Russians? We had heard stories about another troupe like ours that had been captured and was later found raped, tortured to death and mutilated. Would I live to see my seventeenth birthday? I thought of home and my parents. It would break their hearts when they found out. They have had no say, and would not even know about my fate until they received my letter. That could take from one to two weeks.
Dry, voiceless sobs shuddered up my throat.
The truck stopped. With flashlight in hand, the driver came around to the back and lifted us down. Laden down with bags and bundles, we trudged behind our director, Herr Molkow, through a tunnel made of rocks and sandbags to a massive door which opened onto the enormous, empty lobby of Poznan's railway station. Our entrance stirred up a drone of ghostly echoes. Molkow waited until everyone was accounted for, then ordered us to stay there while he oversaw the transfer of our baggage.
Left standing in the middle of this immense, empty space our group appeared lost and abandoned. Our voices drowned in the reverberations of Molkow’s footsteps that multiplied to sound like an army, marching. The echoes hung in the chilly air long after he had disappeared into the shadowy recesses of the depot.
I scanned the dimly lit space for a bench, a counter or shelf, anything where I could set down my load. Nothing. Grimy outlines on the inlaid, marble floor still indicated where such furnishings used to stand, but the place was gutted, plundered. Scrap lumber closed off broken ticket and concession windows. Holes in the stone walls with wires sticking out suggested an earlier presence of lighting fixtures. A low-wattage bulb on a long, thin wire dangled from high above a domed ceiling, casting a dim, shadowy light, the only light inside the station. It was also the only clue that the station was still in operation.
My eyes lingered on the still undamaged, ornately sculpted border that banded the cupola and two supporting marble pillars. It spoke of Poland’s better days, of a time described in dusty old romance novels I had read.
The straps and handles of my bags and bundles cut into my arms and hands. Reluctantly, I set them on the dirty floor to allow the blood to flow back into my freezing, tingling fingers. Inge and Erika did the same. The three of us usually hung out together. Inge was from Hamburg, a quiet, shy, wispy, frizzy-haired dreamer with eyes like a fawn's, only months older than myself. Erika, already seventeen, was my roommate and best friend. Square and solid in build and character, with a no-nonsense attitude, she was my bulwark; my source of stability and advice. In many ways, she and I were opposites. She was orderly; I was disorganized. She respected and obeyed rules; I questioned and challenged them. She was level headed; I was impulsive. I was her source of entertainment and adventure, and she made sure that I did not step off the deep end. She anchored me; I gave her flight. We were a good combination. We needed and depended on each other.
All three of us had signed on with the Molkow Ballet under a government required apprenticeship contract. As minors, we had to attend and graduate from a State-approved program for artists that included more than just dance training.

Other books by Elfi Hornby:

Shadow of Defeat

So, This is America!

Blogger's note:

This is one of my favorite books!

Janelle Meraz Hooper

A very different Fourth of July picnic

2010-07-04T13:41:00.000-07:00

Custer and His Naked Ladies, Janelle Meraz Hooper

Chapter 15- SOAP ON A BOX

Excerpt: (formatting problems, sorry!)
...Vera and Maxine set up the picnic for the first meal. They’d all be there until the fireworks were over later that night, so food would be shuffled in and out of the ice chests all day. Grace had invited Kiowa and Marshall to eat with them;naturally, Maxine was glad they were going to stay near their table to protect Soap. No one around them seemed to notice the company that Grace and her table had were wearing uniforms. The men had been around town for so many years that everyone just accepted them as a natural part of the crowd at any community event.

They did notice the mobsters. Glory wasn’t surprised that everyone gave them a wide berth, even with Kiowa and Marshall there. The mobsters just sneered when they saw Soap, as if the fact that they’d failed to kill him was unsurprising and inconsequential. Glory’s hope of seeing them squirm was not to be fulfilled. At least, they weren’t two-faced enough to smile at Soap and the women as they set up their picnic table. Glory gave them credit for that. They would look at the women and Soap and shift their gun holsters under their suits with their arms. Their demeanor said that they had everything under control, and that Soap’s presence made no difference to them. Had they planned for Soap to be rescued before he drowned? No one would ever know, but Glory didn’t think so.Right next to them, sat Frieda in a lawn chair. By her purse was a disposable ice chest and a grocery sack that looked like it was full of hastily purchased snacks.

“Oh, dear, it looks like she’s brought enough food for the mobsters too,” Grace said, “how did she ever meet them?”

“I don’t know, but her being close to them is no accident,” Vera observed,“One of the mob’s cowboy hats is under her chair.”

“Mom, I’ve told you for years that woman is nuts. She’s going to fool around and get herself hurt,” Glory said. “I can’t believe she was greedy enough to hook up with the mob. If something bad happens, she has it coming.”

The speeches wouldn’t start until nightfall when it cooled off, but groups for and against the casino were already forming around tubs of iced beer. Although it was hot, the adult men wore shirts; only the young boys were shirtless. Glory smiled at the sight of the men in their pressed, short sleeved cotton shirts. There was something respectful about their not sitting shirtless at the tables, as if they’d been raised by a Southern nanny.

By contrast, the mafia formed an uncomfortable,over-dressed third group in striped suits and western shirts, and stood cockily around the soapbox. They’d mumble at each other, then sneer.

Mumble, sneer.
Mumble, sneer.
Vera casually observed the tribe from New York, “They look awfully smug,
don’t they? I wonder what they’re up to?”

“I think they’re trying to intimidate us. And, you know, this is the first time they’ve seen us up close. Maybe they’re sizing us up,” Maxine said.

The women all put their purses on top of the table and raised their eyebrows at the men. The men looked at the flowered purses, then at each other. Puzzled,they shrugged their shoulders. Lordy, Glory thought, this could get ugly. These women had no idea what they would be getting into if a fight started. Glory did. She’d seen the fights between the students and policemen during the peace rallies when she was in college. Many times, she feared the police force might lose it and start firing at the students. It had happened before, at other colleges. If she could have thrown all the women into the car and headed back to Pete’s, she would have. As if they’d go and leave Soap. Well, then, she thought, if she could get Soap to leave, the women would follow.

“Soap, this doesn’t look good. Help me get the girls back to the resort, okay?”

“I can’t leave now, Glory. I could get Kiowa to run you girls home, but I think that we’re safer here, out in the open.”

“Fine. Let’s have a good old-fashioned gunfight and kill everybody.” Glory ignored Soap’s hurt look and turned to join the women.

http://www.amazon.com/ and other Internet book sites

JMCpubs@rainierconnect.com

Judy Comer Franklin, guest author

2010-06-24T07:41:00.000-07:00

Sanctuary Stones, JMC Publishing, paperback, 183 pages, $16.00 USD.

My guest author is Judy Comer Franklin. Judy has just released Sanctuary Stones, the second book in her May Scott Mystery series. Her first book in the series is Cold Passion. Judy was born and raised in North Carolina. She now lives in Tacoma, Washington.

Chapter One

December 1964

Autumn didn’t want to let go of the Wiltshire plain. There had been several days with wind and rain but the leaves, in their colorful splendor, wouldn’t release their hold on the tree branches and fall to the ground. The crispness in the air and sunny days belied the calendar, which indicated harsh winter should have arrived. Lazy smoke rose from the cottage chimneys and left a lingering smell in the air of comfort and home.
Roses spilled over the fences. Apples, some on the ground but more on the trees, were alternately used as weapons for children to throw at each other or to eat, with the sweet juice dripping down their chins.
Birds scratched around in the fields that had been turned under by the farmers’ tractor blades. By now, the birds would have started their migration south to the warmer climes of Southern Europe. This year, though, the geese and smaller birds waited for their inbred knowledge to tell them when to take flight. Their calendars were surer than the farmers, who shook their heads and wondered what was happening to the weather. It was the primary topic of conversation in the pubs and no one had an answer but everyone had an opinion.
The young girl leaned out of her opened bedroom window and took in deep lungfuls of air. She loved the smell of autumn and was happy that it had lasted much longer this year. Her bottle-blonde hair, the same shade as her mother’s, shone in the sunny afternoon. She turned toward the mirror that hung over her small dresser and pinched her cheeks, which were already rosy. Her blue eyes looked back and she smiled in anticipation of her afternoon. After rummaging around her closet, she pulled out a sweater, although she wasn’t sure she’d need it for the ride she was about to take.
Now, all she had to do was sneak out of the house, get her bicycle from the shed in back and make sure her mum saw none of it. She looked at the clock and knew it was time to leave.
She tiptoed out of her room and moved as quietly as possible toward the rear of the little stone house. When she opened the backdoor it made the familiar squeak that usually didn’t sound so loud.
“Sarah, where are you going at this time of afternoon?” her mum asked as she rounded the corner and saw her sixteen-year-old daughter halfway out the door. “It’s almost time to start our tea. Your dad will be home within the hour.”
“I need to go to the library and pick up a book for my school project,” Sarah answered, hoping her mum believed the lie. She could feel the slow flush that was creeping up her neck onto her face. “I’ll be home before dad gets here, I promise,” she said, knowing it was another lie.
Her mother looked at her daughter, saw the flush and asked, “Are you going to the stones? How many times have I told you to stay away from there? The Boat of the Dead’ll take you away to Avalon if you don’t stop it. You aren’t going there, are you, Sarah?”
“No, Mum, I told you. I’m going to the library. I’ll see you later, in time to help with dad’s tea.”
Sarah closed the door and ran for the shed and her bike. Her mother always seemed to know exactly where she was going, but Sarah didn’t believe that nonsense about the stones. She had always felt safe there, as if she was in the sanctuary of a church. It wasn’t scary at all, no matter all the legends that surrounded the stones.
The busy A303 that skirted the village went out to the area, but Sarah knew another way, across the fields and along a path that, for a little while, followed the River Avon. She didn’t like lying to her mum, but she just had to meet him. He had crept into her mind and heart and nothing could keep her from him, even the love she had for her mum and dad.
Her bike rattled over the rough path. The sky was a beautiful robin’s egg blue and the journey seemed shorter than it was because she enjoyed being outside on such a wonderful early winter day.
When Sarah reached a small rise, she got off her bicycle and stood for a few moments and took in the splendid view that lay before her. The massive stones that formed Stonehenge stood sentinel, as they had for thousands of years.
She hesitated and wondered at the small voice that she seemed to hear, coming from deep inside of her. “Don’t go,” it pleaded. “Go home to your mum and dad.”
Sarah got on her bike and considered turning around and peddling as fast as she could toward home. She took another look toward the stones just as he came out from behind one of the sarsens and waved to her. She waved and smiled but the voice was still within her, telling her not to go, to turn back now, before it was too late.

March 1965

“Mrs. Waters, you’ve got to help me,” Sarah said between sobs as she knocked on the door of the whitewashed limestone cottage at the edge of the village.
“Go away! I don’t want anything to do with any of you from around here,” the old voice said.
“I’m desperate, Mrs. Waters. You’re my only hope.” Tears and terror made Sarah difficult to understand.
A gnarled claw of a hand reached outside the door and creaked it open. “All right, child, come in.”
Sarah had never been inside this house but she’d spent plenty of time outside it, especially on All Saint’s Eve. It was a well-known fact that Mrs. Waters practiced the ancient arts of the goddess.
“I didn’t have anywhere else to go. I’m pregnant, Mrs. Waters, and I don’t know what to do.”
“Marry the boy.” A large tabby cat strolled into the room and sat next to the fire, which burned cheerfully in the grate.
Tears ran down Sarah’s face and her tragic eyes told the story.
“So, he won’t marry you, will he?” Mrs. Waters had heard this tale told a thousand times. She moved toward a large, soft chair and sat down.
“When I told him we were going to have a baby I thought he’d be happy, like I was. I told him I loved him and he said, ‘Well, there’s nothing I can do about that. And anyway, how do I know it’s mine?’ Then he walked off and I haven’t seen him since.”
Mrs. Waters looked at the young girl and heaved herself up from the comfortable chair. She walked over to a cabinet that covered the better part of a wall and opened one of the doors. Inside, bottles and boxes were stored in tidy rows. “Here’s what can help you, if that’s how you want to solve the problem.” She walked over to Sarah and handed her a small bottle with an undecipherable label on it. “Take this every night for a week and by the eighth day, he’ll be gone.”
“He?” Sarah asked as she looked at the bottle. It glistened in the firelight.
“Your baby boy,” Mrs. Waters said as she carefully watched Sarah’s
expression.
“My mum and dad would kill me if they knew. I’m their perfect daughter. I’ve always done everything they wanted. I can’t tell them. My mum couldn’t show her face in the village anymore. Dad would be the worst, though. He’d disown me. I’d never see them again. I don’t want to kill my little baby, but I don’t have anywhere else to turn.” Sarah put her hands over her eyes and rubbed them, as if she could rub the horror away. “How much do I owe you, Mrs. Waters? I have some money with me.”
“Naught. Just think hard about what you’re about to do, Sarah. Go to the sanctuary stones and listen to what they tell you.”
“I don’t know where they are. Tell me and I’ll go. Where are the sanctuary stones, Mrs. Waters?”
“You know, child. You’ve always known.”

contact Judy:

purchase her books:

http://www.amazon.com/

http://www.barnesandnoble.com/

Kindle Books! Summer reading!

2010-06-23T15:48:00.000-07:00

Kindle books by Janelle Meraz Hooper

A Three-Turtle Summer- Fictional autobiography, 2002 Bold Media Fiction Winner. Paperback, iUniverse, $17.95 USD. Kindle $7.96 USD.

It's A Three-Turtle Summer--hot--and Grace has to dump a man who's meaner than a rattlesnake and dumber than adobe...

As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries-Fictional autobiography, 2004 Oklahoma Book Awards finalist.Paperback, iUniverse, $13.95 USD. Kindle, $7.96 USD.

Eight-year-old Glory's father has taken out a $50,000 accidental-death policy on her. Now, he's spending the summer trying to collect. A young adult favorite.

Custer and His Naked Ladies- Women's fiction. New. Paperback, iUniverse, $15.95 USD. Kindle, $7.96 USD.

Newly divorced, Glory's biological clock is pounding like a powwow drum. She heads back home to Oklahoma, where she meets Soap, a sexy Comanche lawyer who wants to do something about that powwow drum pounding in her head.

Bears in the Hibiscus- A humorous romance. New. Paperback, CreateSpace, $9.99 USD, Kindle $5.96 USD.

Mary thinks the last person she wants to see on her Hawaiian vacation is her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana Park Ranger...

Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories- Mixed genre. Paperback, iUniverse, $12.95 USD. Kindle, $7.96 USD.

What's a chick story? It's a story with no drugs, bombs or spies who have numbers instead of names. And clean. It has to be clean. Teacher favorite.

http://www.amazon.com/ (and others)

http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

It's good weather to read!

2010-06-06T11:06:00.000-07:00

Hanauma Bay-More research for Bears in the Hibiscus

(Mary thinks the last person she wants to see on her Hawaiian vacation

is her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana Park Ranger...)

Available in Paperback and Kindle, on Amazon.com & other online book sites

What's up? Rain, rain, rain! Two of my friends have grabbed their copy of Bears in the Hibiscus and fled for Hawaii. We had a good day yesterday, but the rain moved in again during the night. In my old age, I have become a realist. We opted to put plastic furniture on our new deck. It was a good decision. Those gorgeous deck sets in the catalog won't float, I'm sure.

What are you reading?- email me (JanelleMHooper@comcast.net ) and let me know!

On my TV- Keith Olbermann and Rachel Maddow with film of the oil-covered birds on the gulf. It's too sad to watch; I have to turn away.

On my Kindle- The Jade Owl, by Edward E. Patterson. This book is pushing all of my buttons. First, it's character-driven, and has the most delicious characters. Second, the subject is about China and Chinese artifacts. As a part-Hispanic, I was always in trouble with my mother because I was drawn to Asian design. She took it very hard. I'm particularly partial to Asian porcelains and fabrics. The writing style could use a little tightening up, but that's a minor issue. I can barely tear myself away to do my own writing! It is pure enjoyment.

The Angel's Game-by Carlos Ruiz Zafron- This well known Spanish author has more books than a restaurant has tortillas. I didn't enjoy this book as much as I expected. I'm blaming that not on the writer but on my American reading taste. I don't like to read dark and gloomy stories. Also, I was puzzled because it didn't draw me into the story until I was at the halfway point. It felt as if, at that point, a different translator took over. I have no idea if that is true or not, but it felt that way. But try it; you'll probably like it. It's a very good book.

On my bed table- cough drops. Just kidding. I've just finished Helli Jondoe by Randall Platt. This young adult novel is a real winner. Briefly, it's the story of a young, orphaned street waif who is sent West on a train and indentured to work on a farm for three years. Based on historical facts, it is a novel with real teeth in it. Hellie has it all: good story, good writing, humor, and drama. If you have a young adult in the family, get it. If not, all the better--you won't have to share it.

Quote du jour:

"I'm so busy I don't know if I found a rope or lost a horse." Unknown, courtesy of Joyce Stevens

Read about my novels:

http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

Order my books on http://www.amazon.com/ and other Internet book sites

Off-shore drilling must stop!

2010-05-30T13:05:00.000-07:00

Waikiki Beach- Now, this is what I call research...

My dad didn't ever say much that I could carry into later life, but he did say one thing I remember: "Girl, sometimes you have to use good old common horse sense."

This is one of those times. We most likely have destroyed the gulf area by the oil spill. Now, don't get all governmental-elitist on me and give me a bunch of crap about how people who know more than I do are in charge. THEY ARE NOT. And don't tell me BP needs and deserves understanding and patience. THEY DO NOT. And don't even bother trying to debate with me about whether or not BP was greedy, negligent, and untruthful. THEY WERE.

Now for the government. They were lazy, incompetent, weak, and possibly guilty of criminal negilgence. THEY WERE.

This gulf area, as other bodies of water, is an important food source for the world. Let's not even go into the economics of the fishing industry. I'm sorry for their lose, but let's stay focused on the main crisis. We cannot allow BP and other oil companies to continue to drill offshore even if they promise not to ever screw up again. THEY WILL.

Stop off-shore oiling. Stop it now. It doesn't take a genius to see what's at risk. All it takes is a little horse sense.

www.JanelleMeraz Hooper.com

I'm back!

2010-05-28T09:34:00.000-07:00

Promotional pins, copyright Lithium Love, 2010

I'm back!- When I began converting all of my paperbacks into a format for the electronic readers, I felt like I got sucked into my computer. Now it's all done and my readers can read my books in almost any format they choose.
I am particularly happy about the font-size options in the new devices. Until recently, I was really sight-impaired. So much so that I increased the font size of every blog and website I have. Now that my sight crisis seems to be over, I'm leaving the sites' font sizes as they are. I hope it helps anyone having sight problems.
What are you reading?- Email me and let me know!
Politics- The gulf oil spill situation has made me very sad. And angry. Is greed the biggest cause of all of our problems? Seems so. If we keep it up, we'll not have an oceanic food supply and this planet will be well on its way to extinction. Well, maybe we are already. I think I heard that there are at least five other oil spills in the Earth's oceans. Now is the time for world leadership. Instead of killing each other, why don't our leaders do something to help us live?
On my TV- I've really enjoyed watching Selling New York on HGTV. Architecture has always been one of my interests and the glimpses of high rise real properties in the middle of Manhattan has fascinated me. The giggle bonus is the people in the show--they are so full of themselves! Sometimes it hurts to watch them. I have to shut my eyes...
On my Kindle- Due to the low prices of books on Kindle, I've finished few books this month. I keep buying more. Who could resist Anna Karenina for under two bucks?! But yesterday, I did manage to finish The Angel's Game (literary) by Carlos Ruiz Zaffron. Also, in May, I read Free Prize Inside (marketing), Last Resort: Marriage (romance), Where the Heart Is ( romance), and Whirlpool (romance). I love my romance books. Years ago, there used to be a commercial whose tag line was: Calgon, take me away...That's the way I feel about romance books. If the situation in the gulf and Wall Street doesn't improve, I'm going to be reading a lot more of them!
Bernie Madoff- I haven't forgotten you, Bernie. What's for lunch over in the big house today?
Health care- Now that we have a health care bill I'm hoping to relax some. I had to withdraw from participation in the discussion because it literally made me sick. I know the bill we got isn't perfect, but we had to start somewhere. Yesterday, in the doctor's office, I read in a magazine that an acress had lung scans for years to keep tabs on a possible cancerous growth. It finally did become cancerous and she had an immediate operation to remove it. That's nice. I'm happy for her. But what about all of the people who don't have the luxury of such expensive, preventative care? Hopefully, we're on the road to making good health care assessable to everyone.
Quote du jour:
"The quality of our expectations determines the quality of our actions." Andre Goden

Bears in the Hibiscus, a humorous romance, now available in paperback on online bookstores like Amazon and Barnes and Noble. Read about my books:

Glory's biological clock is pounding like a powwow drum...

2010-02-09T16:23:00.000-08:00

Order from http://www.amazon.com/ , http://www.barnesandnoble.com/ and others

(6x9, 206 pages, $15.95 USD, iUniverse)

Psst! Looking for a Christmas Kindle book?

2009-12-20T11:13:00.000-08:00

Paperback, $9.99

Amazon Kindle (and others) $5.96 USD

My Bears in the Hibiscus romance has a great Christmas chapter...try it! You'll like it, I promise! If you need a paperback, check out my Custer and His Naked Ladies below!)

-17-
Ray gets lucky

... Of the three, Ray was having the best Christmas. In Anthony, he had definitely found a keeper. His new friend seemed to have an open loft 24/7 during the holidays and he often invited Roxanne and Mary. They almost always accepted. His friends topped the list of Seattle’s elite, and his parties kept Roxanne and Mary scrambling for something new to wear to each affair. It was fun. Ray didn’t have to tell them that not all of his new friends were gay. That was obvious. Roxanne even found a few possibilities for Captain Marvelous. Mary was the only one in the small office who lacked Christmas cheer. The men she met at the parties in Anthony’s loft swam around her like salmon that swam around a piece of driftwood. One look at her face and men knew she was more interested in what was on their appetizer plate than she was in them. Ray said that he had someone picked out for Mary, but he had gone to his cabin in Idaho for Christmas. Or was it Montana? He didn’t mention a name, and Mary didn’t think much about it. She was almost certain that Ray was just trying to cheer her up.
Kate went to her dad’s as soon as school was out, leaving Mary with way too much time on her hands. She worked so hard on her stories that she was issues ahead. Most evenings, Roxanne was out interviewing men to be Captain Marvelous, so Mary had the cleanest oven, refrigerator, and closets in the neighborhood. Stubbornly, she put up a small tree. Each holiday, she bought a few ornaments to remember the year’s events. This year, she had mixed feelings about her purchases; she’d purchased a decoration made from a seashell, a tiny computer to represent her job, and a little forest ranger she’d bought from a Nisqually Jack’s Christmas catalog Ray had at the office. The last ornament tugged at her heart, so she hung it near the bottom of the tree, so it wouldn’t be at eye level whenever she came into the room.
She was looking at paint samples for her bedroom when the phone rang. Distracted by color swatches, she didn’t look at the caller ID before she answered the phone.
“Mary? It’s Mark. Merry Christmas!”
Mary opened her mouth, but no sound came out. She didn’t even know what she wanted it to say. Get lost? Don’t get lost? What?
“Mary, you’re not going to hang up on me, are you?”
“Merry Christmas, Mark,” Mary said coolly.
Mark was ill at ease. Tentatively, he said, “Hey, look, Mary. The reason I’m calling is that all of the rangers that you met on the beach in Hawaii are coming for Christmas, and I was hoping you’d come too.”
Silence.
“They’d love to see you.” Mark’s voice took on a tone of despair and remorse, “I’d love to see you too.”
More silence.
“Mary? Mary, I’m sorry. Please come. You don’t even have to worry about getting a ticket. You can ride on the flight that’s bringing the rangers over.”
“I don’t think this is a good idea,” Mary finally said. “Kate and I have plans.”
“Kate is with her father. I just talked to him. Look, I understand that you’re hurt. Maybe we can work this thing out if you come over.”
“Mark, I have to go. Merry Christmas.” After Mary hung up the phone, she collapsed on the couch and pulled a woolen comforter over her head and sobbed. She cried herself to sleep and hours went by.
When she awoke, it was getting dark outside, and snowflakes were beginning to float past her window. Her tiny Christmas tree was gaily blinking; the reflection from its little white lights bounced off the living room walls and landed on the frosty front yard outside the window. While a fresh pot of coffee perked, she fixed her face, did her hair, and pretended she had someplace to go. She was going for her second cup of coffee when there was a tentative knock on the door. The beat-up old pick-up in her driveway didn’t look familiar, but Mary went to the door anyway. Normally, to be safe, she talked to strangers through the living room window that was eight feet off the ground, but how could things get any worse? The way Mary was feeling, she could give any mugger the fight of his life.
“Hi, my name is Jackson,” the friendly face with a Santa hat on his head said. “We haven’t met, but Mark sent me to pick up his rangers at the airport.”
Mary looked at the small truck. There was no way the beach party could fit in that small cab. But who else could know about Mark’s Christmas plans? She opened the storm door and Jackson explained.
“Oh, I don’t have them,” he said, looking at the truck. “All of their planes got snowed in. The whole west coast is shutting down.”
Jackson took out his cell phone and dialed a number. “Mark, she’s here.” He handed the phone to Mary just as she figured out who Jackson was. His cartoon face was on the cover of the Nisqually catalog. That Jackson.
“Mark? What have you done?”
“Mary, pack a few things and fly back with Jackson, will you, please?”
All of a sudden Mary looked at a freezing Jackson, still on her porch, with the first snowflakes of the coming storm sticking to his eyelashes. Quickly, she pulled the man upstairs and pointed him to the big rocking chair by the tree. While she talked to Mark, she pointed to the coffeepot, and Jackson eagerly filled a cup.
Confused, she asked, “How? There are no flights available this close to Christmas.”
“He’s my friend who has his own plane, and he’s a good pilot.”
Jackson interrupted. “Mary, I hate to rush you, but our window for takeoff may not be there much longer. We really need to leave now.”
Jackson brushed against the Christmas tree and Mary saw the little forest ranger ornament dance up and down. The next thing she knew, she had given the phone back to her new friend and was running down the hall. “Ten minutes. Just give me ten minutes!”
“I’ll unplug the tree and coffeepot,” Jackson called down the hall. “Should I leave some food out for the cat?”
“No cat,” Mary called back. “No dog and no bird, but can you make sure the backdoor is locked?”
“Will do.”
Before Mary tore out the door, she went by the tree and grabbed the little forest ranger...

Need a stocking stuffer?

2009-12-17T10:31:00.000-08:00

Custer and His Naked Ladies, by Janelle Meraz Hooper, available on www.Amazon.com,paperback $15.95 USD, Kindle $7.96 USD.

When her husband unexpectedly dumps her, Glory boards an Oklahoma-bound plane at the Sea-Tac Airport. On her way to the ticket counter, she takes the framed photo of her husband out of her gym bag and dumps it into the nearest trash bin—frame and all. She has wasted too many years on a man who doesn’t want her, and her biological clock is beginning to pound like a powwow drum.

Part Hispanic, part Anglo, and raised on the reservation, Glory hopes that by going back to her roots she’ll discover who she is, but her greedy stepmother who tried to poison her when she was a child stirs up a lot of childhood trauma. Worse, a group of dysfunctional mobsters is trying to get her mother’s land on the Indian reservation to build a casino. An environmental disaster and a surprising death on the reservation keep things moving. But her biggest problem of all may be Soap, a sexy Comanche lawyer who wants to do something about that powwow drum in her head…

Sprinkled with Spanish phrases and Comanche words, Custer and His Naked Ladies is full of Southwest flavor.

Author bio
Janelle Meraz Hooper is a part Hispanic writer who was born in the Southwest but now lives in Washington State.

Her other books are: A Three-Turtle Summer, As Brown As I Want, and Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories (a mixed genre collection), and Bears in the Hibiscus, a humorous romance.
In 2004, her novel As Brown As I Want, The Indianhead Diaries, was a finalist in the Oklahoma Book Awards.

Lost messages

2009-11-10T22:06:00.000-08:00

Dear Reader, I now have 5 messages that I have been unable to open--therefore, I could not reply. I am so sorry. Rather than a Google problem, I think it is an author problem. I have had major surgery and think I'm still foggy. Urgent matters or comments can be sent directly to my JanelleMHooper@comcast.net email account.
I apologize for this inconvenience. Janelle

Note to Republicans: When it's over, it won't be over...

2009-10-08T09:57:00.000-07:00

I may never recover from the disappointment I've felt in the GOP these last few months since President Obama has been in office. It's hard to believe these people are Americans. One of the traits, they say, of real elephants is their ability to never forget. I'm like an elephant that way. I'll never forget, and I'll never shut up about it. As for that red, white, and blue elephant the GOPs put on their campaign signs, well...they know where they can stick it.

Don't forget to send in your Boot buck (see below).

Introducing Boot Bucks for Republicans

2009-09-30T08:50:00.000-07:00

I've had it with the greedy wackos. I used to be polite about the opposition, but these guys are just NUTS. After the news every night, I'll be sending out Boot Bucks to the Democratic party. With the Boot Buck, I'll enclose a real dollar. Feel free to copy it and send out your own.

Two Windows on Ground Zero

2009-09-11T10:59:00.000-07:00

Dear friends, today, I'm reprinting a newpaper article I did for The Northwest Guardian after 9-11. God bless America and its people.

Two Windows on Ground Zero
Janelle Meraz Hooper

September 11th found me stuck at home alone with only a 38-inch screen TV, and a large living room window.
I could have done without the big screen TV. This was one time a one-inch screen would have been too big—too painful to watch. Over and over and over I watched the planes hit the WTC towers in New York City.
A feeling of being trapped overcame me as I looked out the living room window. No sign of the tragedy was visible in the surrounding homes. Not a person was in sight. Maybe it was a nightmare—but no—there it was on CNN. On ABC. On CBS. On Fox. On CBUT, the Canadian channel. I turned to Univision, the Spanish-speaking channel, and saw a blazing banner: Bajo (Low) Attack!
I must have paced between the TV and the window thirty or forty times. Looking at the TV, looking out the window. Still no sign of life in my neighborhood. Where could everybody be? At the time, I couldn’t leave my home, but they were all fully mobile. I can’t explain the intense need I felt to see a human—especially an American human.
Suddenly, A little dark blue import, driven by an elderly gentleman, raced up my neighbor’s long driveway. Attached to the back window of the car was an American flag. A message was painted against the dark glass in white paint: GOD BLESS AMERICA!
While I was waiting for him to come by again, I heard cars honking down the hill. Soon, a car full of hollering teenagers flew by my house. The car was painted all over with patriotic messages, and a young man was fully reclined on the hood holding up an American flag. He was wearing a shirt with an all-over pattern in red, white, and blue stars and stripes. Suddenly, I felt connected.
Dragging my bandaged body along with me, I hastened downstairs to get our flag. When I got to our front porch, I was disappointed to discover that my husband had removed the flag holder from the front of the house. Or had it just rusted off? Anxious to communicate with passersby, I stuck the flag in a huge flowerpot by my front door and went back to my television and my window. The window was a lot easier to watch.

Dump the Republicans

2009-09-04T15:57:00.000-07:00

What’s up? We’ve been rebuilding our sundeck. The white spots are water--it rained. Well...this is the Northwest!

Politics- Have the Republicans in DC gone nuts? We elected them to govern, not wage a fear war full of lies and misconceptions. Their actions are unconscionable. Unbelievable. UNFORGIVABLE. To say they have gone over the top is an understatement. Maybe we do need a two-party system: Democrats and Independents. Our country doesn’t have time to put up with the baggage (lies, cheating, sexual scandals, Christian jihads, etc.) they bring with them. We’ve got serious problems in this country. Their actions on the healthcare issue are nothing short of scandalous. Dump them, dump them all!

What are you reading? Write and let me know! JanelleMHooper@comcast.net
I plan to have more guest authors this winter. I hope you enjoy them and their excerpts.

On my TV- I’m loving the Anthony Bourdain show, No Reservations, on the Travel Channel. What a wonderful glimpse into other people’s lives. Check it out, you’ll like it!

On my Kindle- A Drummer’s Life: Forty years In Rock and Roll by Karla Stover. A nice piece of rock and roll history. Readers will love it, historians will call it a valuable insight into the life and times of Rock and Roll. Shorter than book length…

Bernie (Madoff) – what’s for lunch today, Bernie, over in the big house?

Quote du jour- “Life must be lived forward, but it can only be understood backward.” Unknown. Courtesy of Alexander Vassilieff

Recession buster!
Bears in the Hibiscus, a humorous romance
…Mary thinks the last person she wants to see on her Hawaiian vacation is Mark, her ex-brother-in-law, a Montana park Ranger…
Offered in eBook format on my site for $3.00 (PayPal Only). Available on Kindle for $7.96.www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

No time to edit. I'll do better when I get my bangs cut!

Irretrievably Broken, Irma Fritz

2009-08-03T16:20:00.000-07:00

My guest author this week is Irma Fritz, author of Irretrievably Broken. Irma's characters are a delight. I hope you enjoy this excerpt of her first novel.

Note: Irma and I will both be at Adventures in Literature, August 8th & 9th, in the Auburn Avenue Theater, 10 Auburn Avenue all day (9-5). Come see us! (A part of Auburn Good Ol' Days)

AT THE CUMMER: How Nora Met Max

(On a cross-country road-road trip from Seattle to Washington, D.C., the matriarch of the Adler Family, Ruth; her daughter Nora, her granddaughter Bettina, and Bettina’s godmother Mary stop off at Aunt Ada’s in Jacksonville, FL. This scene takes place while they walk in the Italian Garden at the Cummer Museum.)

Excerpt From Irretrievably Broken, a novel by Irma Fritz
http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B002BMDDZ4

At the museum, Bettina was fidgety and impatient. She didn’t much care for the porcelain or the paintings. Her interest perked up when they looked at Japanese woodprints. She wanted to talk about Lucky, but Ruth made her be quiet, and the girl sulked until they were finally outdoors again.
Walking in the Italian Garden, Bettina said dreamily, “That Lucky is a lucky girl.”
“Who’s lucky?” asked Ada.
“You missed a good one.” Ruth opened the umbrella the driver had given them against the sun, and Ada got under its circle of shade. “Mrs. Nobel’s son met his fiancée in Japan.”
“I’m so sorry I missed it,” Ada craned her neck at the taller Ruth. “I always like a romantic story, don’t you?”
“You would have loved this one,” Ruth laughed. “The prodigal son meets Jezebel.”
“You hit that nail square on the head,” Mary covered her head with an elegant wide-brimmed hat in the same blue hue as her sundress. “You know he’ll be living off of her soon enough.”
“I wonder what job skills she has?” Nora wondered.
“Girls in Japan can make money selling their thongs,” said Bettina, stopping to tie a shoelace.
Ruth glared at her. “You are not talking about those skimpy underpants?”
“Do they sell them before or after they wear them?” Mary wondered.
“Duh. Men buy them in vending machines.”
“Please? Let’s not make up such awful stories,” Nora admonished.
“Mel told me,” Bettina protested. “Her friend knows. He’s an exchange student from Japan.”
“And to think she came highly recommended by Pastor Lars,” muttered Nora.
“It was wonderful how they met,” Bettina sighed.
“He certainly thought so,” agreed Mary, quick to change the subject to remove the furrow of furor from Nora’s forehead.
“You see,” Ruth explained to Ada, “he was convinced that their meeting was providential.”
“Then it’s not for us to say it wasn’t,” Ada, who looked like a bumblebee in a yellow striped dress, suggested. “I love to hear how couples get together. I wonder how Goldie will do with her new beau?”
“How did you and John meet?” Ruth inquired.
“It was very romantic, I’m sure.” Ada stopped to rest on a bench next to a pond. “Just now I don’t recall exactly how it went.” She fanned her face with the museum program, and then asked Nora, “How did you meet Maximilian?”
“The usual way, I guess.” Nora dipped her fingers in the pond and brought the moisture back to her temples.
“Hardly,” her mother objected.
“I met him at a dance,” protested Nora.
“You make it sound like it was the Seafair Ball.”
Nora shrugged.
“I remember now,” Ada‘s long-term memory kicked in. “He saw you in a dream and . . .”
“. . . when we met he recognized me.”
“I’m intrigued,” Mary joined the conversation. “You better tell all, girl.”
“Yes Tante,” Bettina pleaded, “tell all, girl.”
Nora regarded the expectant faces. “If you really want to know.”
“Well,” gasped Ruth, “this has been a long time coming. I better sit down for this,” and she took out her hankie and dusted off a spot on the bench next to Ada.
From another part of the garden came the clink of laughter like wind chimes, then a girl’s voice, clear as the cloudless day, singing a ballad.
“This is going to be so romantic,” Ada flapped her hands in anticipation of Nora’s romantic account of true love.
“Actually, when I met Max he was drunk.“
“I can believe that,” Ruth retorted, but a weary look from her daughter caused her to smooth her mint-green linen dress under her behind, sit on the bench, and be still.
“When my train reached Lost Mine it was dark,” Nora began. “The stationmaster threw all the luggage on the platform, turned off the lights in the station house, locked the door, jumped in his car, and drove off. There were three surveyors, a Native family of six, and I. A man in a pick-up came to get the surveyors. They loaded their tripods and boxes, hopped on the back of the truck and were gone. The family took their bundles and walked off into the night. There were no houses, no people, just the dark, locked station. This was the end of the line, and the empty train was going nowhere until the day after tomorrow when it would head south again. I stared at the place where the rails ended, and I felt very much alone.”
“Oh Nora,” her mother lamented, “how could you get yourself into such a fix. Whatever did you do?”
“The only thing I could do. I put my pack on my back and walked as fast as I could to catch up with the people in front of me.”
“The Indians?”

“Hello?” Nora shouted into the night, “hello?” When one of the men turned, she called out for him to tell her which way the town was.
He pointed up ahead, the way they were going. There were no lights, no sounds, just the dark road, and Nora followed them doggedly, afraid to lose her way in the night before she reached the town. The gravel road turned and wound its way uphill. Her backpack cut into her shoulders and she put her thumbs under the straps, set her feet firmly so as not to slip and fall. The Natives didn’t turn back, didn’t offer to help. They walked silently, steadily. They crested the hill, then disappeared into whatever lay beyond. She followed, huffing, forcing herself to catch up. When she reached the top of the hill, she saw them below, six comforting, shapeless lumps in the night. She ran, slid, caught herself, closed the distance between them, then lost them again to another turn in the road.
For a while, Nora stumbled on blindly, and then stopped. She’d spent her reserve, knew there was no push left in her. Defeated, she released her pack, set it down to rub her aching shoulders, and massage her neck where the bedroll had chafed her. Now she was truly alone.
From what she could tell in the dark, the road was narrow and had been carved through thick brush and the dense pine forest with trees no taller than she was. Nora listened for the bone-chilling howl of the wolf, for the sound of a bear hefting his bulk through the undergrowth. She opened her pack, groped for the rifle she’d taken apart and hidden in her clothes. Would she be able to assemble it in the dark? Even if she could, Klaus’s .22 caliber was meant for birds and small game. Surely, it would be no defense against a seven-hundred-pound black bear.
Then, suddenly, a light appeared in the night. Nora gazed up at the moonless horizon where a celestial artist painted the sky. Although she’d never seen it before, she knew it was the aurora borealis, and she took it as a personal salutation, her own greeting card written across the heavens. She laughed aloud, clapped her hands, and danced in a circle until she felt dizzy. She had arrived at her destination and her arrival had been noted. No longer afraid, she shouldered her backpack and walked along the road singing.

Quote du jour: “It’s always day 1.” Jeff Bezos 7-22-09

http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B002BM23QO

I have a new Amazon Author's Page!

Technorati

2009-07-14T15:01:00.000-07:00

495vdt23mg

Is the bottom of your canoe dry?

2009-07-13T18:03:00.000-07:00

If it's the middle of the summer (and it is) and the bottom of your canoe is dry, you're doing something wrong...

What’s up?

What are you reading? Write and let me know!

Around the house- My husband and other family members are rebuilding our deck. Our grandson says it's so big he wants to paint it green and make a golf course out of it...

Favorite movie lines- “…real peace is not just the absence of conflict, it is the presence of justice…” Harrison Ford as the president in Air Force One.

On my laptop- a new website by children’s writer, Ginger Foglesong Gibson: ReadGinger.com. Ginger writes spectacular bilingual (English-Spanish) books for children. Check it out!

Tech news- The price of Kindle has come down to $299.00 (from $359.00). Woo-hoo! Ya’ll run out and buy two!

In my emails- video from my friends, David and Maddie of a Montana bear pole-dancing. Where was he when I needed him?

On my bed table- Kleenex.

On my Kindle- The Angel’s Game—looking good so far, & Adios Havana, I just got this one, and I’m anxious to read it.

On my Facebook- Two friends who can give me first-hand info on having iguanas for pets. No, I'm not getting one, it's research!

Politics- Is there no end to Cheney’s unlawful mischief? Geez, Louise, he’s like a scientist gone mad.

Bernie- What was for lunch today over in the big house, Bernie? Boston baked beans again? Yum-yum!

Quote du jour- "Whoever said 'nothings impossible' never tried to nail jell-o to a tree" - Lisa Bryant

www.JanelleMerazHooper.com
eBook offer: Recession buster! Read my new humorous romance, Bears in the Hibiscus, for only $3.00! This same book sells for $7.96 on Amazon’s Kindle.

If it's summer it's soccer...

2009-07-07T08:17:00.000-07:00

What’s up?

What are you reading? Write and let me know!

Photo- Where have I been? It’s summer, and summer means soccer around here. The photo is of our daughter waiting for a game of a family member to start. We were in a tournament in Yakima, east of the mountains—where they have sun. How clever those Yakimites (?) are. They have soccer tournaments every summer, and everyone from the rainy side of the mountains races over—whether they play or not. Of course, more than a few of us go for the pork chop breakfasts. Not me, of course. I’m as pure as the driven yogurt. NOT!

On my laptop-online Speed Spanish- I’m about to wrap up my online Speed Spanish course. What a bugger it turned out to be for me. I’m about to throw in the toalla. How come it was so easy for my mother? Oh, yeah…she was Hispanic. When I was growing up they didn’t want us to learn Spanish because they feared we wouldn’t do well in school. Translation: they thought we were too dumb to learn two languages, lol!

Around the house- We haven’t used our pasture (originally a raspberry field) for years, but we got good use out of it on the 4th. We drove right out to the middle and watched the neighborhood fireworks, and there were a lot of them. I wanted to watch 1776, the movie musical, a favorite of mine, but the fireworks were so beautiful with the moon in the background that I forgot to go in on time. I’m going to buy that movie. I see it about three times a year and never tire of it.

Green writer- Discovering Kindle—all of my books are now on Kindle, and I’ve become a real Kindle user because of it. I’m reading books I never got around to reading, new books I’d never get to otherwise, and books just for the heck of it. I hear Jeff Bezos is working on a Kindle that I can take in the shower…

On my TV-
Favorite movie lines: “Somebody has to go to prison…” Sadusky (Harvey Keitel) to Ben Franklin Gates (Nicholas Cage) in National Treasure.

In my emails- According to MyLife, a 63-year-old woman in Istanbul looked at my web page. Really?

On my Kindle- I’m a reada, and I’m a reada, but I’m still only halfway through Wuthering Heights. Isn’t this author (Bronte) dead? Can she be adding to the book as I’m reading it?

On my Facebook- Irma Fritz’s announcement that her novel, Irretrievably Broken was #1 in Kindle sales on Sunday. Irma’s characters are so entertaining. What a good read!

Bernie- A 150 years, Bernie? You should only live so long!

Quote du jour- “A liberal is a conservative who has been arrested." Tom Wolfe

Out of time—no time to edit—I’ll do better after the Spanish final!www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

What are you reading?

2009-06-20T12:54:00.000-07:00

What’s up?

Photo- This photo of Woogie, a friend of my mother's, was misplaced, and just recently found. It was taken at a Comanche powwow in the Wichita Mountains. Woogie was a famous Comanche fancy dancer.

What are you reading?- Write and let me know! JanelleMHooper@comcast.net I'll post replies on this site, but won't use your full name unless you say it's okay.

On my TV- Whale Wars, History Channel. If these guys are the only ones waging a war against illegal whale hunting by the Japanese, the whales are in trouble. I’m not impressed by their lack of common sense that results in risk of human life. It’s kind of like Evel Knievel goes to sea in an ice storm.

On my laptop-the beginnings of a short movie, thanks to an online class I took in video.

In my emails- Someone sent me a video of a small lizard changing colors. The little guy was unbelievably cute to start with, but when he crawled past sunglasses with different color fames and changed to match each frame, I was enchanted. Love that lizard!

On my bed table-This week, I read Plug Your Book! by Steve Weber. It has a lot of insight into how Amazon sells books. If you have a book on Amazon, you should read it.

Green writer- I like to save paper, but one thing I don’t do is use scraps of paper to jot down notes. Bits and pieces are just too easily lost. I use a notebook to jot down notes, and never tear the pages out. When the book is full, I start a new one. I can go back years and find a name or title if I need to.

On my Kindle- Custer and His Naked Ladies, newly formatted and looking beautiful.

Favorite movie quotes- “I’ll have what she’s having.” Customer to waitress after Sally fakes an orgasm in a restaurant. When Harry Met Sally.

Techie news- Dear Amazon.com Customer,
Our customers have told us that they love being able to add highlights and notes to their Kindle books. We want to make it possible for you to access your highlights and notes directly from a Web browser too. So we've released http://kindle.amazon.com, an online tool that enables you to do just that.
To try it out, go to http://kindle.amazon.com, sign in with your Amazon account, and simply select one of your books where you have added highlights or notes.
We hope you enjoy this new feature. If you have feedback please send it to us at amazonkindle-feedback@amazon.com. How cool is this? And it works!

On my Facebook- Susan G. Komen for the Cure SOMETHING DIFFERENT: Did you know that you can “donate” your birthday to Susan G. Komen for the Cure® right here on Facebook? You can make a Birthday Wish and ask friends to donate money to help end breast cancer forever. To learn more, just follow the instructions on the link below...
www.causes.com
Source: www.

Politics- President Obama’s plan might not be perfect in every area, but it’s a start. We’ve messed around for years looking for the perfect plan. Time’s awaistin’. Let’s get on it!

Bernie- What’s for lunch today over in the big house, Bernie?

Quote du jour-
"When a man steals your wife there is no better revenge than to let him keep her." - Sacha Guitry.

Read my new eBook- Bears in the Hibiscus, for $3.00! Sent by email. Pay by PayPal. Info on my homepage: www.JanelleMerazHooper.com (book also available on Kindle for regular price)

What's an eBook?

2009-06-15T11:00:00.000-07:00

(Kindle version)

What’s up?
Photo- My new Kindle cover! The book has been reformatted for easier reading.

Around the house- I dropped my digital camera last week. As I saw it tumble from it’s resting spot about 3 feet from the floor; I didn’t even try to catch it (not that I could have!). I knew it would land on my Asian rug, that is at least an inch thick with its pad. I was sure it would be okay. I was not prepared for it to bounce off the rug and bounce onto the hardwood floor. It’s a Pentax and they're great, so it still works, but I have to hold it together with rubber bands. How tacky is that? I’d better go shopping!

On my radio- Country music: I won’t quote the lyrics because of NASCAP*, but what outrageous lyrics! They make me laugh! *It’s really too bad they’re so snarky—I could give the song a free plug.

On my TV- Animal Planet. Their underwater film of the ocean has me talking to God: “Hey, God! Have you seen what you’ve made? You better get down there and take a look! It’s incredible!” I talk to him all the time like that after my prayers. I think he’s about had it with me. The other night, I’m pretty sure I heard him answer, “Duh!”

On my Warrior (laptop)- Still my Speed Spanish class. I was born without the language gene. I have enough time in this 12-week course to have written half of my next novel. I’ve decided I can be a writer, or I can speak Spanish. I don’t have enough time left in my life to do both. It’s a shame. It’s a dynamite course, and I highly recommend it to the rest of you. It’s just me. I stink at languages.

In my emails- I had two emails asking, “What’s an eBook?” when I posted my eBook sale ad for Bears in the Hibiscus. An eBook is a book that is read on a computer (or laptop) screen like a Word document. It can be printed out. New technologies by Adobe have added features, like a list of chapters on the left and a voice option. The voice itself is a hoot and is worth the $3.00 alone. It’s the Microsoft voice, and it sounds like a man whose mouth is full of dog biscuits. What a hoot!

On my bed table- Still Wuthering Heights and The Seven Pillars of Wisdom.

On my Facebook- More good advice from Walt Shiel, Five Rainbows Services.

Bernie- What’s for lunch today over in the big house, Bernie?

On my Kindle- My new, reformatted version of As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries. Brown is a black comedy about my father trying to kill me for the insurance money when I was eight. It's a good read, and was a finalist in the 2004 Oklahoma book Awards. It's a fictional autobiography.

Quote du jour-
"My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher." - Socrates.

www.JanelleMerazHooper.com
Recession buster:
$3.00, eBook
Bears in the Hibiscus, my latest humorous romance
Kindle version available at regular price

No time to edit! Send your complaints to my email address!

Chinese Muslims being sent to Bermuda?

2009-06-11T11:51:00.000-07:00

What's up?

In my yard- comfrey. I actually saw this stuff for sale in a nursery last weekend. If you see it in your yard, call 911. The stuff spreads like crazy, is impossible to get rid of, and even earned me a visit from the drug police who flew over it in their helicopter when it took over my pasture--they gave it a good look until they determined it wasn't marijuana or anything in that category. That kind of excitement doesn't thrill me. It chills me! Yikes! drug enforcement, in my pasture! Gramma would frown.

On my bed table- Seven Pillars of Wisdom, T. E. Lawrence (Lawrence of Arabia), oh, my! I wish this man were still alive. I have so many questions!

Gregory Orr- The Book That Is the Body of the Beloved, I have treated myself to this poetry book from Copper Canyon Press because one of the lines, … "If we’re not supposed to dance, why all this music?” has been a favorite quote for years. It'll be here soon.

In my emails- Email pirates! They are driving me crazy. I had two this week that were blocked by my Comcast and MSN. Good work, guys!

Politics- what’s this? Chinese Muslims are being sent to live in Bermuda? Where do we Catholics get to go? Probably Newark…

Bernie- What’s for lunch today over in the big house?

Quote du jour: "The statistics on sanity are that one out of every four Americans are suffering from some form of mental illness. Think of your three best friends. If they're okay, then it's you."

Get the eBook version of my latest novel, Bears in the Hibiscus for $3.00 on my www website...Kindle version at regular price.

Legs Lyon and Potato Peel Pie

2009-06-05T14:14:00.000-07:00

Photo-The old cherry tree in our backyard. It must be over 50 feet--was I supposed to prune it?

What’s up?
On my bed table- The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Society, by Mary Ann Schaffer and Annie Barrows. You must read this one, it’s a novel about the Nazi occupation of the Isle of Guernsey during the second World War. But it isn’t all sad. The kooky characters are splendid and are the perfect vehicles to tell a story that would be otherwise difficult to read.
(“…Isola doesn’t approve of small talk, and believes in breaking the ice by stomping on it.”)

On my Warrior- (laptop)-Speed Spanish. It sounded like a good idea at the time. Now, I find myself at 65 reduced to making flash cards. What’s next? Poodle skirts and bobby sox?

Bernie- How’s it going, Bernie? What’s for lunch over in the big house?

On my Facebook- Elizabeth Lyon Oregon Writers Colony is soon to unveil a "writer's bare [almost] all calendar for 2010 as a fundraiser for remodeling the writer's haven, Colonyhouse, to become handicap accessible as well to expand to serve more writers. Interested? Contact me and I'll give you the scoop on how to buy the calendar ($19.95 includes shipping). You'll find a lot of author luminaries lending their bods and mugs. Legs Lyon among 'em.

Green writer- I had planned to finish Bears in the Hibiscus and offer it only in eBook format as my green project for the year. After it was finished, I realized I could also publish it on Amazon’s Kindle and stay true to my pledge. Check it out on my website. I’m having an eBook sale this week--$3.00 for the Adobe eBook with voice activation (please see disclaimer on website). Find it on my book site:
www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

quote du jour:
“In the Soviet Union, capitalism triumphed over communism. In this country, capitalism triumphed over democracy.” Fran Lebowitz

It's all President Obama's fault!

2009-06-01T09:51:00.000-07:00

2009 Apple pies, fresh from the oven by Dick

Republicans-They are still not getting it. Right now, they're attacking President Obama's pick for Supreme Court Justice, Sonia Sotomayor. Their petty attacks have been pathetic and amusing. For instance, the guy (?) who complained about Sotomayor's name being strange. I'm willing to bet he and the other Republicans don't have any trouble with the athletes' names they see on TV every weekend. Names like: Azubuila, Yakhouba, Ignuodala, Llgauskas, Szczerbiak, Oshiomogho, Jakubauskas, and Yuniesky.

Note to GOP: We're not as dumb as we used to be. We check out everything you say and do on the Internet. And forget about side-tracking us. We know what we want, and we want it as soon as possible:

Jobs; an honest, workable foreign policy; health care; education; PEACE; infrastructure; ETC.

No more crap about nothing. These are serious times. Go home and don't come back until you've grown up.

What's up:

Bernie- What's for lunch over in the big house, Bernie?

On my TV- Some dentist who was telling the audience that "They only had to floss the teeth they wanted to keep..."

On my computer- An online Speed Spanish course. It's a wonderful course. Too bad it doesn't have a wonderful student (in me). I thought it was going to be a piece of cake, but with my nonexistent language skills, it has turned into yellowcake (nuclear waste). I blame it all on President Obama. He had to go and make that speech about everyone taking another year of education. It's his fault I'm in the mess I'm in! (;

Around the house- I have a new bird feeder that I have filled with a blend of birdseed for songbirds. They are eating like little flying pigs, but I have yet to hear one song.

This year, my Lady Di rose and my Peace rose look alike. What happened? But they are gorgeous!

On my bed table- The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society. It's wonderful. And Wuthering Heights. I have to confess I've never read this book. I found it for .80 cents in my Amazon Kindle catalog and couldn't resist such a deal. I am really enjoying it. I can't believe I haven't read it sooner.

Quote du jour-"On Wall Street he and a few others - how many? three hundred, four hundred, five hundred? had become precisely that... Masters of the Universe." Tom Wolfe

Visit my website:

www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

I'm having a $3.00 eBook sale on my Bears in the Hibiscus this week...

Pakistan and Three Cups of Tea

2009-05-19T07:22:00.000-07:00

What's up:
On my bed table: If you want a true insight into what is going on in Pakistan right now, read Three Cups of Tea (toward the end) by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin. Some of you must wonder if I worked on this book somehow, because I mention it so much. I did not. I just really think it is a dynamite book. I’m almost finished, so you’ll hear about different books soon…unless I decide to read it again.

On my TV: Silly stuff. MTV is running some shows of famous cribs…that may even be the name of the show, I didn’t notice. It was fun to see how the richer segment lives, but I think one show was enough. I get the idea. They’re rich. I’m not. But, hey, as long as I have my computer, I’m happy.

Bernie: How’s Ole Bernie doing over in the big house, has anyone heard? What’s for lunch, Bernie?

Quote du jour:
“Be the type of woman who everyday, when you get up, the devil says, ‘Oh, crap. She’s up!’” In an email from my daughter.

***

eBook sale: Bears in the Hibiscus, a humorous romance, $3.00 (short time only)

On my website: http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/ Free chapter samples on site.

Too many tubs!

2009-05-15T11:28:00.000-07:00

Today’s news- What’s with those ED ads Jim Moran (D-Virginia) is complaining about? I’m old, so I know stuff: folks, it doesn't matter how many pills you take, there’s not going to be any magic happening unless you get rid of at least one of those tubs…

The economy- What’s for lunch over in the big house, Bernie?

On my bed table- Along with my other books, I’ve been re-reading Uncle Tom’s Cabin. It’s much better, and longer, than I remember. The other stuff includes Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin. I’m loving this glimpse of another culture.

On my TV- The Rachel Maddow Show (MSNBC). She has the most interesting and timely guests.

In the neighborhood- Right down the street, just feet from a busy intersection, there’s a new eagle’s nest. I’m wondering if they’re there for the road kill?

Quote du jour:
"Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of the night." P.J. ORourke, AARP May/June/2002

Recession fighter:
eBook sale! $3.00 (short time only)
Bears in the Hibiscus
(also available on Kindle at regular price)
www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

Biden is right!

2009-05-01T07:24:00.000-07:00

V.P. Biden- Biden is right! Planes are dirty, and those hepa filters they have might really work--if they cleaned them once in a while. I'm flying low today, or I'd have a lot more to say on this subject. I know we have a problem in the economy, but the airlines don't get a free pass for dirty planes just so they can make a buck. People's health comes first.

Confusion among the masses (all 2 of them)

2009-04-22T08:58:00.001-07:00

Title Trouble- On some book sites, the title of one of my latest novels may read: Custer and His N**ked Ladies. I guess it's triggering some kind of porn filter. Oy! People! Naked Ladies are a flower in Oklahoma--and a metaphor in the book. I can't tell you more because it will spoil the surprise. While I'm at it, Custer isn't that Custer--he died in a miscount years ago...

Fox News- I've heard that Fox News keeps referring to Caesar Chavaz as a dictator. Not so! He was elected. It's all in the details, Fox. Get some.

Bernie- What's Ole Bernie having for lunch over in the big house? Has anybody heard?

Quote du jour:
"Anything worth having is worth cheating for." W. C. Fields, My Little Chickadee (unless, of course, your name is Bernie Madoff)

No apple pie today

2009-04-17T11:08:00.001-07:00

graphics courtesy of Microsoft

Food bank- Today, I was going to post a photo of two apple pies my husband made. Works of art they were, with steam still coming out of the vents on the crusts. I thought better of it. I'm re-posting the above photo instead.

I know times are tough. They're even tougher for others that we seldom see. Out of sight, out of mind. Those of you who read my blog have read this before, but we still have the problem, so you're going to read it again.

Please, support your local food bank.

Support global efforts to feed the hungry.

We're getting so much wrong, you'd think we could get this one simple thing right. Momma don't want no more hungry children in the world, hear? Now's a great time to write a check. Much better than tomorrow or the next day. 25,000 people a day die from hungar. People! This is a problem we can fix! Let's get on it!

What's up?

2009-04-16T13:02:00.000-07:00

In my kitchen- I’ve got a few Easter eggs left. Some cheesecake, ham, and potato salad. I won’t really get back to work until at least the cheesecake is gone.

On my bed table- I have a stack of books and a new Kindle 2. I don’t know which to read first. In the last two weeks, I’ve read The World Wide Rave by David Meerman Scott (Marketing), Graphics on the Kindle, 2nd edition by Manuel Burgos, Tim Gunn’s Guide to Style, and Isaac Mizrahi’s How to Have Style. You may know, I’m heavily into self-help and self-improvement books. The marketing book is a real winner. The graphic book resulted in my dynamite cover on my new Kindle book, Bears in the Hibiscus. So far, I haven’t dazzled anyone with my new style. I don’t care what anyone says, I’m keeping my wardrobe of tee-shirts from book festivals.

Politics- The fizzle in the drizzle. One reporter’s description of The Tea Bag Rebellion in D. C. courtesy of The Rachel Maddow show, MSNBC

No one mentions the pollution all of those teabags are creating in the water. Where’s the EPA?

Bernie-What’s for lunch over there in the big house, Bernie?

Quote du jour:
Make tax day and election day on the same day. Anonymous. Seen on a billboard

New! Baseball short story posted on:

Three Cups of Tea

2009-04-08T16:37:00.000-07:00

What’s up?

In my pictures file-a photo (see above) sent to me by my lifelong friend, Joyce, on her Hawaiian vacation. I have a good picture of her eating a snow cone, but I’m afraid she’ll hurt me if I post it! (Aw, Joyce, everyone wears a bikini in Hawaii!)

On my bed table- Three Cups of Tea by Greg Mortenson and David Oliver Relin
I ordered this book so that I could participate in Pierce County Reads, the program where everyone in a certain area reads the same book. I wasn’t real enthusiastic because I had a new book to read already on my bed table, one that I was really excited about: The Seven Pillars of Wisdom by T. E. Lawrence (Lawrence of Arabia). However, I am delighted with the book by Mortenson and Relin. I can barely tear myself away from it to do my work. Get it, you won’t be sorry!

In my garden- Twice in about twenty years, my red camellia in the backyard has bloomed. This is one of those years. I wish I knew what the magic trick is. It is truly gorgeous.

On my TV- Baseball! Go Mariners! And more Boston Legal. Can’t get enough of that Shatner guy.

Politics- Oh! did anyone hear what Ole Bernie had for lunch over in the big house today?

Quote du jour:
“Here (in Pakistan and Afghanistan), we drink three cups of tea to do business; the first you are a stranger, the second you become a friend, and the third, you join our family, and for our family we are prepared to do anything—even die.”--Haji Ali, Korphe Village Chief, Karakoram Mountains, Pakistan (Three Cups of Tea)

My new novel on Kindle:

Bears in the Hibiscus

Order from Amazon Kindle

Bears in the Hibiscus

2009-04-02T12:33:00.000-07:00

Kindle cover, Rare Arts

My new romance- Bears in the Hibiscus, is now on Kindle! Thank you, everyone who helped with this project!

Politics-How about our President Obama and First Lady Michelle? Woo-hoo! The magic is back!

Ole Bernie-How's he doing today? What are they serving for lunch over there in the big house? I hear they keep confiscating millions and millions that he thought he'd hidden. How does that song go? You can't run from the long arm of the law?

Bush et all-I hear some of our past elected officials better not travel abroad--they may be arrested for war crimes. Will someone send those guys a travel catalog?

Amazon-I'm waiting for delivery of a whole stack of books. My UPS man and Bezos make such a nice couple.

Quote du jour:

"One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter." Die Another Day, movie

New, improved cover!

2009-03-24T10:51:00.001-07:00

Cover art: Kindle@RareArts.com

Book design: Walt@FiveRainbows.com

Kindle Project-For those of you producing a book to put on Amazon's Kindle, take note of the two resources below my new cover. Believe me, it will make your life so much easier. There is also a helpful book on Kindle Graphics: Graphics On The Kindle by Manuel Burgos (Rare Arts). If you're an author and don't know about the 16 shades of gray, get this book!

After days of trying to get this project done on my own, I turned to these two sources. They improved the design and readibility of my book immensely. I thank them from the bottom of my heart.

Bernie Madoff-I didn't get my wish. They didn't send Ole Bernie to a regular prison. But at least, they sent him to prison.

AIG-I feel so much better about them after their name change to AIU, don't you? It should have been changed to AOU (America Owns Us). Those greedy stinkers.

Republicans-When will they catch up with the rest of the nation? They are so out of touch they need a ladder to pick flowers.

Obama-I love the example he's setting for the rest of the nation's fathers. Taking time off to be with his family for his girls' spring break is fabulous! I am very impressed.

On my TV- I have just discovered Boston Legal (I'm always about three years behind the trend when it comes to TV shows because they have to compete with the History Channel and baseball). I love it! William Shatner is such a delight. His sidekick, James Spader, is also wonderful, but the whole cast shines. What fun to see Candice Burgen more often!

On my bed table- I've been researching old westerns. They are so bad, I won't list them here. But the American West is a new passion of mine. Along with Lawrence of Arabia. I have a lot of new books on order from that www place that is named after a jungle. So I'll be reading some more of the newer bestsellers. I have to order paperbacks instead of Kindle books because of a complicated gift card purchase I made from a relative.

Quote du jour:

"Never pass up a good beach!" Janelle Meraz Hooper (Inspired from my new romance.)

Read sample pages from my new book:

Bears in the Hibiscus

2009-03-15T21:01:00.000-07:00

Hi! I finally did get the PayPal connected for my new novel on www.JanelleMerazHooper.com . I don't think there's a way to do it here on Google. Wait, there has to be. Maybe it's time for bed. It's been a 13-hour day.

Quote du jour:

"I'm either going to be a writer or a bum." Carl Sandburg

That big, yellow square box in the road...

2009-03-10T09:30:00.001-07:00

Yesterday, it snowed again here (and for the three days before). We live on a hill, and a school bus stalled right in front of my house. The woman got out, and dutifully put a small, orange triangular warning road hazard sign behind the bus. How funny! It's required, I know, but if someone can't see a big yellow school bus stuck in white snow...I'm just sayin'...

Bears in the Hibiscus is ready. Maybe I'll get the Paypal hooked up today on www.JanelleMerazHooper.com It'll be on Kindle soon, too. Maybe even Sony. And in a paper cup with string near you...

Rainbow Bookfest is gone for another year

2009-03-02T10:16:00.001-08:00

The Rainbow Bookfest in Seattle, celebrating writers of color, came and went on Saturday. I love these events. I always meet such wonderful people and learn so much. This time, I took time away from my book-selling table to visit with other authors, take a class on zines (what a wonderful, creative art form!), and listened to a lecture on Woman at War (in Columbia and other South American locations).
I even bought a book that was so beautiful I couldn't resist it, even though it is in Spanish. It's loaded with wonderful color art plates and even has a CD tucked into the back. I have no idea what the cd says, but the whole book it is so beautifully produced: Cantares de un Alma Gitana, by Maria Nelida Mendoza. If you get a chance, give it a look. There was no website listed on the book, but they must have one.

I did release my new romance, Bears in the Hibiscus in an advance copy format. The final is yet to come. I tweaked too long. I always do.

Obama's speech last week- I'm still waiting for that Harvard Online Catalog so I can get that extra year of education that our President wants me to have. In the meantime, as a back-up, I've found some interesting alternatives in the local adult education class schedule: Aerospace Composite Mechanic looks promising, as does: Accounting spreadsheets (I can add 2 plus 2 and get 22 everytime, as my daughter says), American sign language (with my crooked, arthritic fingers, this should be really interesting), Welding and metal skills---well, you get the idea. Seriously, I really did find one I liked: How to make it in voice-overs. I had a radio show years ago, but everything has changed since then. I could really use this.

Have to go. I'm way behind. No time to edit. Send corrections to: http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

Quote du jour:
"Be the kind of woman that when your feet hit the floor each morning, the devil says, "Oh crap, she's up!" courtesy of my daughter, Chanel Studebaker

Oh! BAM a!

2009-02-25T06:53:00.000-08:00

Obama's State of the Union Message:
What a speech! I am a little worried about that part about every American getting one more year of education. Does he mean me too? I just turned 65. Well, okay. If he's askin', I'm taskin'. I'm sending for that class schedule from Harvard. I hear they're online now...

Quote du jour:
"If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door." Milton Berle

Rainbow Bookfest, February 28th, 2009

2009-02-23T09:58:00.000-08:00

Come see me! I'll be on the memoir panel

February 28th, 2009

Langston Hughes Performing Arts Center

104-17th Ave. South, Seattle, WA 98144

I'm going to release my new romance*, an eBook, at the Rainbow Bookfest on Saturday. Come pick up a copy at the special price of $6.00 (after Rainbow, I'll be charging $2.00 extra for S&H). This is one of my green projects for the year. I have one more planned, a compilation of good work done by Northwest writers. I plan to post this on our website: http://www.northwestauthors.com/ . Yes, we can, America!

Bears in the Hibiscus

Janelle Meraz Hooper
-1-
Harvest Joy

When Mary’s husband, Brian, decided to end their marriage, it didn’t take him long to pack. That was because he had already been leaving, piece by piece, for years. Most of his clothes were already on the yacht that belonged to his father’s timber company. He had never been the outdoorsy type, so they had no closets filled with tents and blue-speckled coffeepots to sort through like some divorcing Northwest couples did. When the end finally came, she didn’t cry a tear; all she felt was relief. As he rushed from room to room, opening closets and cupboards to make sure he hadn’t forgotten anything, Mary searched for parting words to mark the occasion. She found none. The best she could think of was a few hand gestures that she managed, with great effort, to keep to herself.
It was a hard adjustment for Mary and her daughter, Kate. Now, nearly two years later, they were comfortable on their own. It was a Sunday morning, and Mary was on her deck. The sun didn't have any real warmth to it yet, but the air was fresh and lightly scented with spring.
She savored her days off, even though she considered herself incredibly lucky to get a job in a literary field at her age. She still didn't know what made the publisher hire her. She’d never used her degree in journalism, and the world was full of writers. Almost all of them were younger and more qualified. It had to be that she and the publisher were both single mothers trying to survive in a new world that had, without notice, changed the rules about men going to work and women staying home to raise their kids, prune the camellias, and make the meatloaf.
At least, the timing was good. Her daughter, Kate, was in high school now, and Mary had baked her share of cookies for the PTA, served on the county’s charity boards, and worked on the state’s political campaigns. She was bored, and ready for some new challenges. Ready but unprepared. Although logic should have told her that her marriage would end someday, she hadn’t made any preparations for joining the workforce. Divorce found her with an empty closet, her nails a wreck from the camellias, and hair that hadn’t seen a good cut since she’d found a coupon in the library parking lot one rainy day.
Oh. And she was an emotional wreck that, for some reason, she was unable to overcome or hide. Other newly divorced women managed to put on a perky face, bravely go to the next singles’ party, and flirt until they dropped. Why couldn’t she? Twice, for days, she’d planned outfits to wear to singles’ events. When she got there, she looked around at the men oozing with so much confidence they hadn’t even bothered to change out of their faded polo shirts and wrinkled khaki pants. Each time, she’d made a quick break for the parking lot. She was not that needy. She would never be that needy. She’d become a nun first.
It had been a shock to be single again, and realize just how little her stock was worth in the dating market, now that she was no longer in her twenties. Once reality had set in, she was no longer surprised or hurt when her phone didn’t ring on Saturday night. She had become like the big moon snails on the beach at Hood Canal. Still soft on the inside, but tough as a geode on the outside. With a clear idea of what was likely, and what was not, she was finally moving on with her life.
Stretched out in the old plastic lounge chair on her deck, Mary forced herself to start a whole new train of thought. She closed her eyes to daydream about the imaginary man du jour. She had a lot of them. Some were serious. Some were funny. Some were short. Some were tall. But they all had one thing in common: they all adored her.
Today’s man was one of the best so far. They were on a yacht on Puget Sound on a starry night. She snuggled into her hair and imagined him, thin, late fortyish, and bright. Mary squirmed in her chair and smelled his cologne. His closeness was electric as he sat beside her on some cushions on the deck and handed her a glass of wine. Together they gazed at the stars. She smiled. In her mind, it was easy to create a perfect world with no nastiness, no late child-support checks, no ex-husband, and no intimidating in-laws.
This gorgeous, literate man was nuzzling her neck and the side of her face. Mary could feel the gentle bobbing of the boat beneath them. “I want to make love to you,” he whispered. Feeling no resistance, he pulled the cushions off the bench seats and made a comfortable spot for the two of them on the floor of the yacht and cradled Mary in his arms. He kissed her long and slow on the mouth and ran his fingers through her hair. His hand moved down her neck and easily found her breasts. He slipped his hand underneath her bottom as he pulled one of his legs over hers. His soft laughter surprised her, and she felt the warmth of it on her neck. Before she could ask him what he found that was amusing, he rolled over and looked at the starry sky, took a deep breath of night sea air and said, “You know, I got a bigger boat than I needed for one person just so I’d have comfortable sleeping quarters on board.”
“Is that funny?” Mary asked.
“No," he said, “what's funny is we're sprawled out on the deck like teenagers...let's go below...”
“I kind of like it here.”
“Me too, but there's not as much privacy on the deck as you might think. We're close to the traffic channel and the bigger yachts passing us have a clear view of us snuggled up on our cushions. Besides, I bought matching sheets and everything.” He pulled himself up off of the deck and headed toward the cabin.
“I'll turn down the bed and you join me when you're ready. Then he winked at her and added, “If you dare...I plan to have my way with you!”
The mood was broken when the dog next door started howling at a siren on a fire truck blocks away. Mary pulled herself up in her chair and pulled her sun hat down over her forehead. Oh, what was the use? So she was lonely. What else was new? At times like this, she forced herself to remember that she had been alone for years before her divorce. Days and weeks went by when she barely saw her husband. Even when he was home, it was only physically. His mind was off someplace else. At family events, Brian’s absences raised his parents’ eyebrows. Mary made excuses for him, but she, too, wondered what he was up to. Was he really working? She suspected not, but there was no way to prove it, short of hiring a private detective. Snooping on people wasn’t her style, so loneliness and suspicion seeped into her life, like the mold that worked its way into cracks in her bathroom tile. She much preferred the loneliness she was experiencing now that she was divorced. It was a more honest kind of alone, and it didn’t hurt nearly as much as when she was married and her empty bed refused to answer her question, “Where is he tonight? Who is he with?”
She reached for her coffee cup. It was empty. Great. No sex. No coffee. What's next, world chaos? No wait, we already have that, she reminded herself.
The synopsis for Bears in the Hibiscus is on the previous post.

Quote du jour:

"Be good and you will be lonesome." Mark Twain

(epigraph, Bears in the Hibiscus)

http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/

Psst! Republicans! Knock it off. we're watching you!

Republicans and Wall Street still don't get it!

2009-02-03T19:48:00.000-08:00

Coming in February 2009!

Bears in the Hibiscus, an eBook
Janelle Meraz Hooper

Mary Bergstrom, a single mom, has left her twenty-five year marriage and entered the work force for the first time.
Luckily, she has found a job she loves and two good friends who are also starting their lives over. Despite challenges, they haven’t lost their positive, humorous outlook. Mary has a plan to make a success of her new life that includes fiscal stability and excludes men. Not that she has anything against them, she just thinks she can’t afford them. Unlike Mary, her friend, Roxanne, is launching a detailed plan to find Captain marvelous with a yacht. Ray, another friend, bounces from coffee baristas to business moguls looking for love that’s lasting and real.
Mary’s plans aren’t that grand. All she wants is a Hawaiian vacation so she can relax. Too late, she discovers her ex-brother-in-law, Mark, a park ranger from Montana, will be there at the same time for a conference on state parks. He leaves a note for her at the hotel desk warning her to watch out for bears. He hasn’t seen any, but he thinks there might be Bears in the Hibiscus.
Mark’s interest in her brings complications she isn’t ready for: romance; wealthy, demanding in-laws that she didn’t like the first time she’d married into the family; a jealous and vindictive ex-husband; and a greedy and crazed ex-sister-in-law who dumps her two daughters to follow a con man into a scheme to get-rich-quick raising emus. Then, when that fails, she takes off with a rich Arab in a silk keffiyah.
Mary can’t deny she may have found true love in Mark, but is it worth it if it means being a part of that family again?

More info soon

Now you know where I've been! Politics or no, a girl has to work! Not that I haven't noticed how badly the Republicans and Wall Street moguls have been behaving. They just don't get it. I'm hoping Obama jerks a knot in their tail (he says he's got to be conciliatory, but I don't!).

Message to the Republicans: Knock it off!

Message to Wall Street: We want our money back!

Quote du jour:

"Never write a letter. Never throw a letter away." Mayor Richard J. Daley, Chicago (courtesy Keith Olbermann, Countdown)

At last! An Idaho Baker!

2009-01-20T07:40:00.000-08:00

Poster courtesy of Joyce Stevens

Thanks, Joyce!

Over two years ago, upon seeing the candidates for president in 2008, I complained that they were all Tater Tots, and what this country needed was an Idaho Baker.
We got him. No more hash browns!
God bless America. God bless our new president, Barack Obama.

Songs du jour:

"Joy to the world. All the boys and girls now. Joy to the fishes in the deep blue sea. Joy to you and me." Three Dog Night

"Birds flyin' high. You know how I feel...it's a new dawn...it's a new day...feelin' good." Anthony Newley and Leslie Bricusse

S. J. Robinson, Guest Author, Health Care Reform

2009-01-13T10:19:00.000-08:00

S. J. Robinson and her novel, The Price of Death

A few weeks ago, in my rant about Americans having a lot of work to do to get this country back on the right track, I mentioned several target areas. Among them, the war, infrastructure, education, and health care. Here to speak on health care reform is fellow author S. J. Robinson, who is uniquely qualified to speak to our health care issues.

LET’S PUT ADULTS IN CHARGE
S. J. Robinson

S.J. Robinson is a former nurse, lawyer and authors. Her debut novel, The Price of Death, is a medical malpractice fiction illustrating the startling events that go on behind the scenes in our health care system. You think you know what is wrong with our health care system? You need to read this book. See more of S. J. Robinson’s information about our health care system and, more importantly, how to fix it, at . www.sjrobinson.com/

We have been relying on the free enterprise system to provide us with many of our needs for a long time—food, clothing, medical care, housing. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. Why doesn’t it always work? Because no one is in charge!

A totally unregulated free enterprise system is like a room full of kindergartners without a teacher. The kids are likely to come up with some very creative ideas. The problem is that they don’t plan ahead.

We need some adults in charge, people with experience to set the guidelines for the kindergartners. That is what the government is supposed to be doing. Unfortunately, it failed with the banking sector and it is failing in our medical system.

In both these areas the government failed because the only goal it set was to make a profit. That’s right, by historical accident corporations are legally required to think of profits ahead of your welfare. The best way to do that is to convince the public to accept the least amount of service at the highest price. That is what caused banks to make loans that they knew were unlikely to be repaid, and why big pharma and insurance companies haven’t come up with an efficient, practical way to deliver health care to the millions of upcoming baby-boomers. We know what happened in banking, but did you know that the US spends twice as much on health care as any other country and we rank 37th in the world in health care delivery, just after Costa Rica?

Medicine has known for years that the human body has about a 50-year warranty and after that things start going wrong. We have also known that there are a number of baby-boomers who are approaching or have passed age 50, yet we continue to rely on the free-enterprise system to solve the problem of delivering health care to this burgeoning population. There are lots of good points about the free-enterprise system, but planning for this catastrophe under the old rules is not one of them.

We need adults in charge to reset the rules so that the kindergartners can come up with their great ideas in an environment that doesn’t kill us or them. Let’s reset the goals for private enterprise. The new rules should require the best, sustainable service possible for their customers, not making profits for their shareholders.

Thank you, Sue, for all of your efforts on our behalf. I'm one of the lucky ones who can cover my health care costs (but not much else!). It breaks my heart when I see people go without good health care. Visit her website and get involved. We can do better, America.

Mt. Rainier in a flood mode

2009-01-11T01:58:00.000-08:00

Mt. Rainier, January, 2009

Maybe you heard. After our snow, came floods. I know this is a lousy photo, but it was lousy weather. This is what millions of gallons of snow looks like when it's melting into the local rivers and towns. The good news was, our levies held--there was some doubt if they would when the river rose 36 feet above flood level. All in all, great weather for writing. I got all the way through another edit of Bears in the Hibiscus.

It's two in the morning, and I've never dazzled anyone at this hour (Well, maybe when I was much younger...). Before I go back to bed, who's watching Bush tomorrow?

PS- If anyone needs a creative way to save a 100-year-old Chickering from flood waters, let me know...

First Annual Stir-crazy Writers' Contest winner!

2008-12-29T15:22:00.000-08:00

Announcing the winner in the First Annual Stir-crazy Writers' Contest!

Charlie has a new book out:

Mama, I'm Coming Home
Charlie E. Brough

The first book Thank God for Pigs 1926-1945, introduced the author's family. A host of other people, both real and fictitious. There is the great depression, World War II, and for Duncan McGrew, a new beginning. For Cathie, his wife, a new life, but not without troubles similar to Job in the bible, all while rearing four children on an unproductive dirt farm. Book two of three, Mama, I'm Coming Home Bremerton, WA, 1945 - 1953 takes the reader on a historical, humorous and sometimes sad journey for a country bumpkin family attempting to adjust to life in the city after 19 years on the near waterless dirt farm. Tom McGrew survives Rheumatic Fever, but can he live in the same house with his father? Arnie joins the National Guard at age 16. Leane and Nora suffer over mothering from being molested by her father as a child. Arnie meets Lisa, his true love at the high school sweetheart swirl, then loses her. Trouble brews for her and Arnie. Then already in trouble, Arnie tells his father that he's joined the army during the middle of the Korean War. Duncan says things he regrets. Will he ever get the chance to tell his son how he really feels? iUniverse, $33.95 USD

I don't have my copy yet. I could have used a new read during this snow.

I'm not including other entries, as I'm not sure of their original source, and I don't want a bunch of copyright lawyers on my doorstep. But they were very funny.

I'm hosting the local flu bug this week, so will close.

Before I got sick, I did post two new stories on my book website:

Old Joe and His Yellow Cadillac is very different from my normal work--it's very sad. Tango Moma is really just a filler about my mother.

STILL snowed in...

2008-12-24T10:10:00.000-08:00

2008 winter storm- I was here, but I had to get up to take the picture...

I'm getting a lot of silly stuff from my very non-techie writer friends today who live in the area. I decided to join in. Oy! Will the snow never quit?!

Have you heard the rumor about the $30 billion buy-out plan for writers? As soon as I get my hands on the paperwork, I'll pass it on.

Quote du jour:

"One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter." Die Another Day

Mama Mia

2008-12-23T18:37:00.000-08:00

Have you seen Mama Mia! yet?

What are you waiting for?

Christmas?

(I have no connection with this or any other film. Just in case you're wondering...

welll...I was in a Warren Beatty film once...as an extra...in a parade...)

NOTE: I HAD AN EMAIL ABOUT PUNCTUATION. SORRY, BUT THE GOOGLE POSTING LABELS DO NOT ALLOW EXCLAMATION MARKS. THAT DOESN'T MEAN THERE AREN'T OTHER MAMA MIA! ERRORS. I'M JUST SAYIN'... (DOT DOT DOT!)

Call your loved ones!

2008-12-23T10:07:00.000-08:00

2008 winter storm, December

My herbs are somewhere underneath the snow on those hanging pots. The birds are still ignoring my whole wheat bread crumbs--I suspect another neighbor is offering bagles...

We lost power for a bit last night. Our Puget Power was on the spot. I was still fussing about the tarnish on my silver candlesticks when the lights went back on. Thank you, Puget Power! You rock!

If this storm ever had any dazzle, it was lost when my furnace went off. We have a wood stove, but keeping a fire made in a woodstove when in a wheelchair is a fulltime job. Even so, the wood is stacked on the floor by the hearth--at the ready. If our power goes out again, I'll go to work fulltime gladly. Right now, it's 32 degrees, so it has warmed up a lot, but not enough.

On Friday, it is supposed to rain--and that always brings floods here. Oh, the fun never stops.

Seriously, my heart goes out to the young and the old who may be suffering from weather wherever in the world they may be.

Call your loved ones and check to make sure they're okay. If my granny were still with us, I'd call and caution her to be careful of burning candles, portable heaters, and loose sleeves around stoves. If you are new to our area, and are cold, KNOW THAT YOU CANNOT USE A GRILL INSIDE TO KEEP WARM. IT CAUSES CARBON MONOXIDE POISONING. Our housing is too air tight. I KNOW I HAVE A REPUTATION FOR HUMOR, BUT THIS IS NO JOKE. IF YOU HAVE NO HEAT, FIND SHELTER IN A CHURCH OR COMMUNITY HALL.

BE SAFE.

BE WARM.

TAKE GOOD CARE.

Janelle

It's a good day to watch Mama Mia again

2008-12-22T09:21:00.000-08:00

December, 2008--Not bad for a rain forest, eh?

Snow- We're due for more snow today, but it's warming up. It's only 30. Yesterday, we had 12-17, depending upon where you were. I was one of the lucky ones who was in the 17 degree zone. Get out the sunscreen, Mama! A lot of my fellow writers have lost their power. In our senior years, being cold is about as much fun picking cactus stickers out of your behind.

The shot is off our sundeck and looks toward our pasture. I used to be an organic gardener, and the back pasture was a wonderful garden. Now, organic food is everywhere, and we've eliminated all but the cherries, plums, apples, pears, and blackberries. The new varieites of raspberries have inspired us to replant some of the vines next year.

I'm off to watch Mama Mia! again. It's set in Greece, so it's warm there.

Hope your Holidays are merry and WARM.

Happy Winter Solstice!

2008-12-21T11:15:00.000-08:00

Winter, 2008, wood sculptures by Linda Studebaker

Snow- We're almost snowed in here. There is at least 10 inches of snow on my sundeck and just as much ice and slush on our hilly roads. In between snowstorms yesterday, we did manage to get some friends over for lunch. We were in such a hurry to get them back to Seattle safely, we forgot to serve dessert. Now, I'm stuck (!) with a pound or two of homemade caramel with almonds. Weep for me.

Lists- I'm still making lists and checking them twice. Sadly, the list gets shorter every year, as I've lost most of my senior relatives. How I miss my mother and her sisters. It would be hard to pick a favorite aunt. All of them were funny and loved to laugh. As I am just part Hispanic, for most of my life, I felt like just a partial member of their very special club. In later years, the aunts opened up more. In my last visits, I felt like a full fledge member of the Meraz Women's Club (Oklahoma-California-Missouri). How I wish they could have lived long enough to read the books I based on them.

My Aunt Norah and I pulled one of the last pranks together when I was visiting Lawton. A fellow member gave us the keys to her house so we could feed her cats while she was out of town. While we were in there, we put a life-size cutout of Billy

Ray Cyrus in her kitchen. We put an ex-rated note on his chest. He looked so real, he startled her. She found someone else to feed her cats on the next trip. Ha!

On my dvd- Mamma Mia! Psst! Pierce Brosnan can't sing, but he doesn't know, so don't tell him. No matter. I loved him and Meryl Streep and the rest of the over-forty cast in the movie. If you haven't seen it, get it. It's a wonderful way to celebrate the Winter Solstice. Plenty of blue water and sun. I loved every bit of it.

I'm famous in our family for giving a movie 12 minutes. If it doesn't grab me by then, I'm punching out of it. Carl Sandburg did much the same thing with books. I've read that, when he was traveling around college campuses giving talks, he'd stop by the college bookstore and pick out a book to read. When he got to the checkout counter, he's rip off the first third of the book. He'd tell the clerk to save the rest under the counter. If it was any good, he'd send for the rest. According to the story, he never did.

On my bed table- I'm still reading Lawrence and Zig Zag, with a short pause to read my friend Nancy Covert's new romance, Kaniksu Magic. Books are piling up, and I'm not good at dusting, so I'm going to have to take an afternoon and finish some of the books I've started. Sometimes, I set my alarm for an hour earlier, and read until it's 8:00 AM. As an empty-nester, I can get away with this. With kids, it doesn't work. The minute the alarm goes off, they're hungry, no matter what time it is!

I hope you're having a very Merry Christmas. For my friends who do not celebrate Christmas, I wish you much joy and happiness. Thank you for being a part of my life.

My Christmas List

2008-12-18T15:59:00.000-08:00

Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all of our friends!

My Christmas List
Janelle Meraz Hooper
from Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories

Here they come again. On my television screen. Men with no shirts on, hawking men’s cologne that my husband wouldn’t wear to chop wood. It’s just $69.99, the tagline says. Who are they trying to kid? That’s almost $70.00!

And here come the beautiful women looking like they’ve never cleaned out a sink basket. They’re trying their best to convince my husband that he doesn’t really love me if he doesn’t buy me that ring that has diamonds big enough to choke a hippopotamus.

The tip-off for these pricey gifts is the tagline at the bottom: available in fine department stores everywhere. I’m waiting for the ad that says: Pick one up anywhere—we made a zillion of them! Better yet would be an ad that said: Free with a tank of gas!

Luckily for our bank account, after over thirty-four years, my husband has my number. If he wants to make me happy, all he has to do is bring on the singing fish. The rest of the family is catching on. My aunt sent me a singing chicken. My grandson gave me a singing lobster last Christmas. This year, I’m hoping for singing turtles—three of them.

Add to my list:

I want the new re-mastered CDs of classic rock and roll songs recorded by guys like Hall & Oates, Jerry Lee Lewis, and Mick Jagger. They rock!

And one of those big packages of computer paper in assorted colors. I want the loud kind. Not that wimpy, pastel stuff. I have no idea what I’ll do with it, I just want it. It must be the little kid in me.

Then, I want a tree, some tangerines, and some popcorn. It’s not Christmas without popcorn. Everyone knows that except that skinny guy on my television with the shaved chest selling cologne.

Oh, and honey, I was just kidding about not wanting the diamond ring. I’m crazy, but I’m not dumb! Pick one up!

Bernard Madoff

2008-12-18T13:21:00.000-08:00

Good grief! After they caught Bernard Madoff in a $50 Billion skam, all they did was give him an ankle bracelet and send him back to his $7 million dollar apartment?! Why? They say because he's never been a flight risk. Of course not. Why would he run when there was so much money still left on the table? Now, they say their biggest fear is that he'll commit suicide. I think not. Just last week, he took all of some widow's retirement money and she may never get it back. This happened when he knew he was going to be caught. The man has no conscience. Whatever makes them afraid he'll kill himself? My bet is he'll be on a safe beach somewhere before my coffeepot is dry. What makes us so stupid? Is someone taking a payoff? What?

I wish someone would ask the guy, "How much is enough? Who the heck needs $50 billion dollars?"

I keep thinking of that line in National Treasure: "Somebody's got to go to jail."

Well, at least the guy took my mind off of Winter Solstice. Two more days to go. Winter is sure going out with a bang. We're due for four inches of snow. Here in the foothills of Mt. Rainier, we usually get more.

Back to my novel, Bears in Hibiscus. It's warm there.

I've posted a couple of Christmas stories on my website:

Note: For those of you who are as frustrated as I am, I have set up

a skam-free zone at the above site.

It contains sample chapters of my novels:

A Three-Turtle Summer

As Brown As I Want: The Indianhead Diaries

Custer and His Naked Ladies

Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories (mixed genre)

5 days until Winter Solstice

2008-12-15T10:28:00.000-08:00

Cabo, a million years ago

5 days until Winter Solstice

Augh! There's not enough eggnog in the world to get me through the next five days. Maybe I'll rewrite my Bears in Hibiscus romance again. Especially that chapter that takes place on a Hawaiian beach.

With the sun.

The blue water.

The white sand.

Quote du jour:

"There's no such thing as bad weather...only bad gear." Bob Bundy

I hope he's pretty.

2008-12-12T11:36:00.000-08:00

Psttt! (see below)

Is there no end to the greed? Another Wall Street scandal. I didn't even bother to look and see who this new guy is. Throw the book at him. And let's not send him to some cushy white collar prison. Let's send him to a real prison. I hope he's pretty.

On my TV: I took the night off and watched Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.Like all of the Indiana Jones movies, it was predictable--lots of bugs. It was ants this time. Always entertaining, this Indiana Jones movie was a closer. I'm glad they let us know what happened to the characters in the first movies.

That was one of the reasons I wrote Custer and His Naked Ladies. My readers wanted to know what happened to Glory. That surprised me. I expected them to wonder what happened to Grace. Glory was patterned after me, and I guess I never thought the character was as interesting as the others.

Quotes du jour:
I did get a couple of good quotes from Indie:

"How much of life is lost in waiting?" and

"We seem to have reached a point where life stops giving us things and starts taking them away."

Don't ask me who said what. I was busy eating popcorn, and didn't notice the names of the characters. After all, it was my night off...

Psst!!! Have you sent that check to the food bank yet? It's up to us now to take care of each other. Momma don't want no more hungry kids, Ya'hear?

Citigroup Rant

2008-12-09T11:42:00.000-08:00

And while I'm on a rant, what's this crap about Citigroup paying $400 million to have the replacement for Shea Stadium named after it?! That's OUR money. We want it back! Note to Wall Street: The party's over. Pull the plug on your ice chest and get the hell out!

How arrogant can they get???

2008-12-09T11:00:00.000-08:00

Wall Street- I don't believe that John Thain actually had the nerve to ask for a $10 million dollar bonus. Other financial executives are carrying on with business as usual, taking expensive trips and bonuses...how arrogant can they get?!

We are saps if we let them get away with it. Even though Thain has withdrawn his request, look for him to get it under the table somehow. What a bunch of crooks.

Here's a message for the clueless: We are broke. Our children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, and beyond will be paying this debt that may even cost us our freedom.

Wall Street needs to suck it in and do without, as the rest of us are. And, while they're at it, they can clean up this mess. They made it. They should clean it up!

Allowing these crooks to continue business as usual is criminal. CRIMINAL. A lot of these suckers need to go to jail. Let's start with the big, arrogant banks who are gouging us. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $10 million dollars. Go straight to jail.

How timely that the new decorating trend is "shabby chic".

Winter Solstice is next!

2008-12-08T08:50:00.000-08:00

Merry Chrismas from the cranberry bogs in Washington State.

Dear friends- I have changed my Google settings which should make it easier for you to leave me messages. I love to hear from you!

I was clueless about how Google works but, thanks to J. A Konrath (http://www.jakonrath.com/), I've discovered a lot of message that have been left that I never saw because they were left days after I posted and I never looked back. I always try to answer messages, and apologize to readers who didn't get an answer to a message--I never saw it!

I guess it's time to get some work in. My husband threw away the last of the Thanksgiving leftovers--the cranberries. Wasn't it cranberries that Louie Anderson used to talk about in his hilarious comedic routine about the holidays? He said his mother would say, "There are some on the table, some in the oven...some in the neighbor's garage next door..." My daughter and I used to laugh until we cried. He is the funniest man in America.

Now, you might say, it's on to Christmas. WRONG. Winter Solstice is next on my list. I may start a countdown tomorrow. In case you're one of those people who doesn't notice when you have to hang a flashlight around your cat's neck so you can find it, solstice is December 21st. I have a special lamp for my office this time of year. It looks like an octopus, and has five 60-watt bulbs. It burns whenever I'm working early. My cd player blares Hall and Oates, and I wear all my rhinestone jewelry on my sweatshirt, wrists, and fingers. Augh! I hate the dark!

This was in my email, and I think it's interesting:
Bar Codes Identify Country of Origin - Be Sure to Check Them
The whole world is scared of China-made 'black hearted goods'. Can you differentiate which one is made in the USA ,
Philippines , Taiwan or China ?
For example, the first 3 digits of the bar code reflect the country code where the product was made.

All bar codes that start with 690, 691, 692, thru 695 are MADE IN CHINA.
Bar code items starting with 471 are Made in Taiwan like this one:
Chinese businessmen know that American consumers don't prefer products 'Made in China ', so they don't show from which country it originates any longer. However, you may now refer to the barcode. Remember if the first 3 digits are in the range 690-695, then it is Made in China . 00 ~ 13 USA & CANADA
30 ~ 37 FRANCE
40 ~ 44 GERMANY
49 ~ JAPAN
50 ~ UK
57 ~ Denmark
64 ~ Finland
76 ~ Switzerland & Liechtenstein
471 ~ Taiwan
480 ~ Philippines
628 ~ Saudi Arabia
629 ~ UAE (United Arab Emirates)
740-745 ~ Central America
Please inform your family and friends.

It is our human right to know, but its not the government's job to educate the public, just to rake in the taxes.

Therefore, we have to protect ourselves & make everyone aware.

On my bed table- Two books:

1. Agent Zig Zag by Ben Macintyre-about a spy who worked as a double agent for Nazi Germany and Great Britain, and

2. T. E. Lawrence by His Friends, edited by A. W. Lawrence. If you're very young, T. E. Lawrence was Lawrence of Arabia. What an amazing person! He is definitely the second person I'd most like to meet in heaven.

The first is my grandmother, so I could ask her whatever possessed her and my grandfather to get off the wagon train in Oklahoma. Oklahoma! There were no jobs there. No water. It was 60 miles from the Texas border where prejudice against Mexicans was off the hate-meter. Why, Gramma, why?

On my TV- not much. I don't know how many times I've watched You've Got Mail with Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks, but it is perfect for this time of year. Lots of sunlight and flowers. Loved it (again!)

My website- Over the weekend, I moved my older stories on Halloween and Thanksgiving to an archives page. If you missed one, you can find it there (http://www.janellemerazhooper.com/ )

Custer and His Naked Ladies- a review that was reprinted from an Oklahoma City paper was in USA Today. I hope you saw it! I missed it until someone emailed me about it.

Kindle/Sony- By the end of the week, all of my books should be on Kindle and Sony. A Three-Turtle Summer and Custer and His Naked Ladies are on them now. Unfortunately, Custer is showing the wrong cover. That happens in this computer age. They'll fix it!

Quote du jour--Catalog humor:

On a plaque: Follow your dreams. Except that one where you fly. That never ends well.

On sweatshirts:

Paddle faster! I hear banjo music!

I was told there would be no math involved

Most of these were in the Wireless Catalog. I've misplaced the source for the math quote...

www.heifer.org/catalog --Don't we all have enough stuff? How about sending small livestock to a needy family somewhere in the world? It's easy. Heifer does all the work.

Soldiers Give Writer Reasons to be Thankful

2008-11-26T08:17:00.000-08:00

I have newer Thanksgiving stories, but this is still my favorite. I posted it a couple of years ago, and have had a request to re-post it. It was originally published in the Ft. Lewis Guardian--hoo-ah!

Soldiers Give Writer Reasons to be Thankful
from
Free Pecan Pie and Other Chick Stories
Janelle Meraz Hooper

When I was a kid, I was raised in a large military family in a small town next to Ft. Sill, Oklahoma. Half of my family was Catholic and the other half Baptists (don’t ask!), but once a year, we got together at a large table to make a turkey suffer. My uncle, the Head Baptist, had such a reputation for praying so long every year that my grandmother always brought a rosary to the table so she’d have something to do while he blessed everyone but the pope.

But, to be fair, he always had a lot to pray about. That year, I had three relatives overseas. One was in Korea, one in Japan, and one in Alaska. Well, I know Alaska isn’t technically a foreign country, but we worried about him just as much as the other two. So my uncle would pray and pray, then, when even his stomach started to growl, he’s say, “Amen!”

While he filled his plate, he’d start around the table, asking each person to share what they were thankful for that year. I usually said something dopey like, “I was thankful for my mother and my new poodle socks.” And I was. Truly. It was short and sweet, and he’d move on to my cousin, who always said something that his mom had helped him rehearse, like he was thankful for the farmers who worked so hard to provide the feast we were going to enjoy. I always kicked him under the table after he said something like that.

Well, I’ve grown, and at sixty, I have a whole list of things I’m thankful for. If he asked me now, we’d be there until a green scum floated on the cranberry sauce: I’m thankful for a loving, healthy family. I’m thankful for this beautiful planet. I’m thankful for this country. I’m thankful for those old geezers who wrote all that “We the People” stuff. And I’m thankful for the men and women who protect it everyday.

As I write this, it’s weeks until Thanksgiving, and well, with the world situation the way it is, some of you may not be sitting at your family’s table this year. Although I wish deployments weren’t necessary, I’m thankful for a strong fighting force that is able to keep the peace wherever it’s needed.

Most of all, I thank God for letting me be born in this great country, enabling me to see my child and grandchildren grow up safe and healthy. Oh, sure, I crab about the politicians and what’s going on with our government, doesn’t everybody? But usually about then, they have a story about Afghanistan or Iraq on TV. Then (too often it seems), I see an American soldier pushing through the sand, probably praying he or she doesn’t step on a landmine. I always think that if I’m watching, maybe their parents are too, and how stressful that must be for them.

So, to the men and women who are out on a limb sometimes and think nobody cares, I do. Lots of us do. And we’re thankful not only for you, but to your families who make such great sacrifices so that our children and grandchildren can play in our backyards without fear. Happy Holidays, dear brave men and women, from my heart to yours. Come home safely.

Quote du jour:

This story reminds me of one of my favorite movie quotes that I regret I have to paraphrase because of a misplaced dvd. Tom Cruise asks Demi Moore why she is so adament about representing two marines that have gotten themselves into trouble in A Few Good Men. She replies, "Because they stand the wall...when sometimes no one else will."

More Thanksgiving stories on my book website: www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

I'm on Kindle!

2008-11-16T13:00:00.000-08:00

Now on Kindle!

Two of my novels, A Three-Turtle Summer and Custer and His Naked Ladies, are now in the Kindle catalog. If you have a Kindle, look me up!

On my bed table- If anyone wants to know the difference between men and women, they'll find it in Clive Cussler's book, Treasure of Khan. I snatched it off my husband's bed table because my books didn't come in. Before I gave up and ran screaming for my M&Ms, I'd read through 14 pages of a storm at sea during a Mongol invasion of Japan in 1281 with people dying and boats breaking up. And I still don't know what the treasure is. This is why women should rule the world. If there was a treasure, we'd tell you about it on page one.

On my TV- I was watching the old version of The Thomas Crown Affair on Friday, with Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway, and was fascinated by how much better the new version with Pierce Brosnan and Rene Russo is. One of the big changes in the script was that the old version's focus was on the theft of money, and the new version's focus is on the theft of art. Beautiful art. The change makes the newer film a lush, visual treat. Money, is nice, but it's boring to look at unless it's yours. The ending in the Pierce Brosnan film was also so much better. The ending in the first film was vague. There was more, but I've probably bored you too much already.

Politics- I like those Obamas. They have the same core values as I do. With me, it's all about the kids. I hear that the girls' grandmother may move into the White House to look after them. Those girls are in for a rough 8 years, and anything that can help them is a good idea.

Green writing-Even if you're not a writer, there's a lot to be said for freezing meals for later use. My husband cooks big batches of things like spaghetti, lasagna, chili con carne, soups, chowders, burritos, etc. and freezes them in individual serving sizes. All from scratch. Many are either partially or all organic. He usually does this on a rainy Sunday, but he's been know to whip up a huge pot of beef stew on a weekday evening. Think about it. Not only is it green, but it's a great time-saver. And no pots to clean up every night.

Quote du jour:

"Writing is the only thing that, when I do it, I don't feel I should be doing something else." Gloria Steinem, courtesy of About.com

Read sample chapters of my books on:

www.JanelleMerazHooper.com

Thanksgiving fillers on homepage!

Sha-na-na-na, Goodbye!

2008-11-13T09:41:00.000-08:00

Politics- Oh, no! Bush is still working (read: messing things up). Please, Mr. President, step away from your desk. Sit. Don't move or talk until the moving men arrive to carry your chair (and you) out the door.
Luckily, I heard on the news last night that they have a "fix" for all of the last minute mischief Bush may create.

I heard that when Obama won, an impromptu crowd of about a 1,000 gathered outside the fence around the White House and sang the hockey song (I don't know the name) that goes: "Sha-na-na-na, sha-na-na-na, hey, heeey! Goodbye!" How rude! But I'll bet it felt good!

Green writer- As an anthropology enthusiast, I've worked as a docent at two major history museums. I miss them, but I'm just beginning to learn about the museums that are beginning to put their treasures online. How great is that?! There are so many benefits to this online archiving that I don't know where to start.
Just one: of course, you know, that museums rotate their exhibits, so we never see everything they have in one visit. But now, theoretically, I could click on a museum and see everything they have in, say, quilts or baskets. All without leaving my house. I'm going to call it pajama research!

eBooks- I'm slower than most to warm up to the new rush to eBooks, but, recently, I needed some information that wasn't carried in the local bookstores. I ordered the eBooks and got them so fast I didn't have time to walk to the kitchen to get coffee. Amazing. If you haven't tried an eBook yet, you should know the price is a lot less too. Who knows? Maybe I'll break down and order one of those Amazon Kindles. I'm holding back because Bezos is so proud of them (they retail for around $359.00). However, since my books will be on Kindle and Sony soon, I guess I should get with the new technology. Maybe I could give up chocolate for a month...

Quote du jour:

I have always imagined that paradise will be a kind of library. - Jorge Luis Borges (courtesy of Abe Books)

Visit my book site and read sample chapters of my books: